Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Me: Maybe it’s the weed talking but your apartment seems enormous. IKEA Manager: Sir.
  • People will think you know what you’re talking about if you give your opinion while cleaning a pair of reading glasses.
  • “You’re such a stalker!” God forbid a woman wants to know more about her future husband.
  • I feel sorry for non-glasses wearers. They’ll never know the joy of cleaning them and suddenly being upgraded to the UHD package.
  • So apparently if they ask “do you trust me?”, replying with “well, I trust you to be you” is the incorrect response.
  • Ten million people accused me of exaggerating today.