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Commentary:
"Ah, the modern-day philosopher's dilemma: Why did they break up? 🤔 Let's hope Google can solve this mystery faster than they figured out how to roll out self-driving cars 🚗🔍 #RelationshipGoneGoogle"

advice, breakup, broke, couple, Google, humor, relationship, should

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Sometimes my mouth hits send before my brain has a chance to stop it.

1 month ago

before, brain, chance, communication, humor, mistake, mouth, send, sometimes, stop, technology, texting
Take a broken girl, fix her. And she will go back to the same guy again.

1 month ago

back, broken, broken girl, fix, girl, guy, heartbreak, humor, irony, love, relationship, same, same guy, take
We should start referring to age as “levels.” So when you’re level 80, it sounds a lot cooler than just being an older person.

1 month ago

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If your drinking story doesn’t involve law enforcement, I’m not listening.

2 months ago

adventure, drinking, enforcement, humor, law, law enforcement, listening, nightlife, party, story
If A-B-C-D didn’t take their sweet time in the alphabet song, LMNOP wouldn’t have to sprint every time.

1 month ago

alphabet, every, humor, letter, music, pace, song, sprint, sweet, take, time, timing
The only problem I have with chocolate is that one minute it’s there and the next it’s not.

1 month ago

chocolate, craving, food, humor, i, indulgence, minute, next, only, problem, snack, sweetness

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

Had some plain yogurt with protein powder in it for breakfast, and not only is it high in protein and very filling, it’s also disgusting.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

Call me constipated the way I don’t give a shit.

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I just tried to groom my dog myself, and I now fully understand why the dog groomer charges more for a haircut than my own stylist.

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Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

What career is most compatible with the unemployed lifestyle?

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Sometimes I think I should talk to my colleagues more often. Until I talk to my colleagues.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Reddit:

First World War. Kind of nervous.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Another customer getting a haircut started talking to my barber. Please don’t talk to my barber. You have your own.

Going viral on Threads:

Bro, are you a black hole, because you suck energy and light?

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Thanks to AI, some of us went from being told by our parents not to trust the internet to having to tell our parents not to trust the internet.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

The subtle art of letting yourself go crazy once in a while.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Humming & dancing while I plop my meds into my weekly pill counter like the happy little nutcase I am.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

My favorite things about Twitter are that everything you read is true, everyone is nice, and all intentions are pure of heart.

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You should be able to google why a couple broke up.

Sometimes my mouth hits send before my brain has a chance to stop it.

Take a broken girl, fix her. And she will go back to the same guy again.

We should start referring to age as “levels.” So when you’re level 80, it sounds a lot cooler than just being an older person.

If your drinking story doesn’t involve law enforcement, I’m not listening.

If A-B-C-D didn’t take their sweet time in the alphabet song, LMNOP wouldn’t have to sprint every time.

The only problem I have with chocolate is that one minute it’s there and the next it’s not.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

There I was, quietly reliving my dream of having my own house, when suddenly I was attacked by insane prices.

I’m really looking forward to eight hours of thinking about sleep tonight.

The real challenge of adulthood is figuring out what to eat every day.

It’s exciting to receive a Valentine’s Day card and not know who it’s from. A Father’s Day card, not so much.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

If I worked for UPS, there would be a 100% chance I’m falling out that open door when I turn a corner too fast.

I’m done wasting money this summer, unless you guys want to do something this weekend.

She was unique, like a millennial that could drive a stick shift.

Sorry, I ghosted you. I liked you too much.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

I accidentally bought a pair of nose-cancelling headphones and now my glasses keep falling off.

Hilarious when peoples outgoing voicemail message says they “can’t make it to the phone right now.” You carry the phone with you. It’s the only constant in your life.

Wrapping gifts on the floor after 50: 1% holiday spirit, 99% figuring out how to stand up without calling for help.

If rich people aren’t upset after an election, then we have failed.

If you feel depressed, go for a run. You will soon find out your physical health is far worse than your mental health.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

I don’t really care how you met your partner. Tell me about how you met your nemesis.

Which one of you shrunk all of my jeans?

Take your days off, these jobs don’t care about you.

I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

Keeping a picture of my bed in a locket around my neck and staring at it longingly on my lunch break.

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You should be able to google why a couple broke up.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Sometimes my mouth hits send before my brain has a chance to stop it.

Take a broken girl, fix her. And she will go back to the same guy again.

We should start referring to age as “levels.” So when you’re level 80, it sounds a lot cooler than just being an older person.

If your drinking story doesn’t involve law enforcement, I’m not listening.

If A-B-C-D didn’t take their sweet time in the alphabet song, LMNOP wouldn’t have to sprint every time.

The only problem I have with chocolate is that one minute it’s there and the next it’s not.

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