Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Anyone else’s phone make a retching noise when you unlock it with Face ID?
  • No one told me middle age would be so fuzzy, and if you are wondering whether I mean my eyesight or my facial hair, yes.
  • Not leaving the house and not having contact with other people. The punishments of my childhood are now my hobbies.
  • I’m going to start walking around in my yard all day in a bathrobe so my neighbors will build that privacy fence I always wanted.
  • Gonna tell my dentist that if I’m late, he should start without me.
  • Do you mind if I become the object of your desire? No worries if not.