Funny good quotes show that even the “good” parts of life aren’t safe from a little humor 😂. From good intentions that go sideways 🙃 to “good enough” efforts that totally miss the mark 🎯, life constantly delivers comedy wrapped in positivity 🤪. These quotes capture the irony, the silliness, and the awkward charm of trying to do good — and sometimes failing spectacularly 🤣. Get ready to laugh at how wonderfully weird “good” can get 😄!
New funny good quotes
- Been telling everyone, “It’s been a good year for horses.” No idea whether that’s true or not, but they keep nodding like it makes a lot of sense.
- Good morning. Does anyone know what is right and what is wrong?
- A good audiobook will have you inventing chores to do.
- Libraries were a good start, but we need more places where people can’t talk.
- If you’re having a good day today, don’t play Wordle.
- The concept of hot water showers feeling so good but not actually being good for your hair or skin is disgusting.
- I still haven’t heard one good argument why I should stop believing in Santa.
- Females be naked so much online, I be like, damn, I bet she look good in a sweater.
- I’ve been asked to join a swingers club, but I’m a little nervous. What if I’m not good enough? I haven’t been on a swing since I was 9.
- I recently discovered “movies.” They’re usually like an hour and a half long, and a pretty good way to kill time. Check it out.
Top funny good quotes
- Breaking a heart is considered bad, but melting a heart is somehow good.
- Men are very good at being women lately.
- Getting tipsy at a dimly lit restaurant with good conversation would heal me right now.
- My son was praying for “everybody in the world.” If you suddenly start experiencing good fortune, you’re welcome.
- Eating Chinese takeout is never as depressing as in the movies. It usually is good.
- Interviewer: Why do you want to work in customer service? Me: Well, I’m really good at apologizing for things that aren’t my fault.
- Best thing about TikTok is you literally don’t need to follow anyone to have a good time.
- Having a mom who cooks good food is such a big flex.
- A good French onion soup will have you acting like a pervert.
- Dating apps are no place for meeting your soulmate. The best way to find your soulmate is to tweet really good.
Popular funny good quotes
- I wish people knew how good I can sing when I’m alone in my car and in my shower.
- Putting mental health before my education is a good idea until it affects my education, which affects my mental health, which affects my education.
- Honestly, how women are drawn in a manga is typically (though not always) a good clue for what demographic a manga series is.
- I have good problem-solving skills, but my problem-creating skills are where I really shine.
- Never trust a man that’s good at flirting. He’s had too much practice.
- Daily reminder that you’re biologically programmed to get laid, eat good food, connect with other humans, and enjoy yourself. Everything else is literally made up.
- I really understand why boomers text with ellipses between everything… it feels so good…
- Staying up all night so I don’t miss any good posts.
- Good morning to everyone except people who sit right next to you when there’s a whole room full of empty seats.
- I try to find the good in every situation. Wait, no – that was a typo. Food. I try to find the food in every situation.
More funny good quotes
- Don’t ruin a good sundress by wearing panties.
- Remember the good old days when you didn’t have to wonder if the person messaging you was a bot or not?
- (Most depressed guy you’ve ever met) I’m doing pretty good.
- Libraries were a good start, but we really need to keep working on the number of places where people shouldn’t be allowed to talk.
- When people block me, I just assume it’s for my rugged good looks and killer jawline.
- A good relationship is when she is by your side during bad times to tell you that none of this would have happened if you had just listened to her.
- Photogenic people are magical. You could snap a pic of them mid- explosive diarrhea, and they’d still look good.
- “I’m in a really good place right now, not mentally. I’m just indoors with air conditioning.”
- “Communism sounds good in theory, but doesn’t work in practice.” Capitalism doesn’t even sound good in theory.
- Me going to work because I’m too honest to scam people, too shy to be an influencer, too good for a sugar daddy, and too dumb for crypto.
Witty good quotes
- They should invent a food that sounds good for dinner tonight.
- What are some good jobs for someone with no passions, interests, motivation, social skills, or strengths?
- “I’m not afraid to admit when I’m wrong. For example, I thought it was a good idea to leave the house today, which, as it turns out, was a terrible mistake.”
- Out of Office: I am on vacation. Your emails will be forwarded nowhere to be read by no one. Good day.
- Yes, I upload photos with filters because I want to look good. If you want to see the ugly side of me, come to my house.
- I hate checking my bank account after having a good time.
- Good morning to life’s chaos, where my coffee is the only thing that makes sense!
- All I’ve ever wanted is to look good naked, hope that someone can take it.
- Going to the gym for my health and wellbeing? No, I just wanna look good naked.
- Scrolling… good take… bad take… nothing take… cyberbullying… beautiful woman.
Funny good quotes remind us that being good, doing good, or even feeling good doesn’t always go as planned 😅. From well-meaning advice 🗣️ to overly optimistic promises 🎭, life’s good moments often come with a hilarious twist 😂. These quotes are perfect for anyone who’s ever proudly said “this is good!” right before things went hilariously wrong 🤷♂️. So keep aiming for good, enjoy the bloopers, and always find the humor in life’s imperfect perfection 🤣!