50+ Funny Job Quotes That Perfectly Sum Up The Working Life Struggle

New funny job quotes

• Today I was in a taxi, and the taxi driver said, “I love my job. I am my own boss, nobody tells me what to do!” Then I said, “Turn left.”

• The worst part about going to work is the part where you have to go to work.

• Just got hired at Five Guys as the guy who punches the burger before they put it in the bag.

• Therapy is basically me saying, “I did a thing,” and my therapist saying, “Yay, good job!”

• Quitting my job to focus more on my desire not to work anymore.

• Do you think working at Pizza Hut would help you get a job at Sunglass Hut? You know, with all that hut experience?

• Having a job ruined my life.

• Dear unsuccessful applicant, we ultimately decided to split the role between existing staff without paying any of them extra.

• Increasing the amount of high fives I give my boss each day until he quits his job.

• If a company’s hiring sign says, “Come grow with us,” you’re about to do the work of 3-5 people.

Top funny job quotes

• My cat, who has no job and pays no rent, is apparently unhappy with his fancy new cat food, and I, for some reason, am currently on my way back to the store to rectify the matter.

• Maybe dogs are smarter than us because they found a way to get fed and housed without having to go to college and get a job.

• If it weren’t for this whole job thingy that pays me money, I’d become a professional nap taker.

• I’ve started ripping my shirt in half like Hulk Hogan when I mean business. Long story short, I’m looking for a new job.

• The lion does not concern himself with attaching a cover letter.

• This whole “having a job” thing is really getting in the way of me having my best life.

• To avoid burnout at work, use the 30-30 rule: after 30 minutes of work, quit your job and disappear into the mountains for 30 years.

• Working my first office job. Is it normal to have nothing to do?

• Don’t ask me for work advice, I’m just going to tell you to quit your job.

• Pilot is one of the few jobs where you can get fired for going above and beyond.

Popular funny job quotes

• I wish that reading books in the park were my job, and I got paid six figures for it.

• “AI is coming for your job.” Yeah, I’d like to see AI drink 11 coffees, then have a panic attack.

• Brain, I know you’re trying hard, but you are not doing a good job.

• Beer is like weed for people with jobs.

• I need a job where I don’t actually have to work.

• The fact that I procrastinate and still get the job done is the reason I still procrastinate.

• Fake laughing with customers is actually a job skill.

• I’ve tasted being employed, and I’ve tasted being unemployed. I recommend not being born.

• My laptop is overheating because I am doing a really good job.

• I was not meant to work a job; I was meant to lay down and ponder.

More funny job quotes

• Updating my resume. Anyone got a more professional word for “dumpster fire”?

• If I had a boyfriend, I’d watch him dig a hole at the beach and be like, “Wowww, baby, good job. That’s a beautiful hole.

• Using Indeed feels like being an ugly guy on a dating app.

• Quitting my job to focus on staying inside.

• Texting my boss from the job I got laid off from 5 months ago and telling him I have diarrhea.

• We live in a cosmic tornado, but sure, let’s all get jobs.

• Apologize for the job that you do. It would be nice if you were talented too.

• Thinking about quitting my job to focus on my girlfriend.

• Might quit my job to focus on summer.

• My career goal is to be able to just delete my LinkedIn account at some point.

Witty job quotes

• Seems like being an asshole is a full-time job for some.

• They should invent a job that actually wants to hire you after you apply.

• Never let your job prevent you from acting unemployed.

• At the job interview with one AirPod in.

• Good morning everyone, who feels like working today? I promise I’ll let you do my job.

• I’m so hungry, I could eat a full-time job with health insurance.

• They need to invent a job for people who aren’t good at anything nor motivated nor social.

• I’m the guy at Apple who makes sure all your featured photos are your exes and your dog that died.

• “Can you explain the gap in your resume?” I went missing in a national park.

• They’re making me do work at work.

Funny job quotes remind us that work might pay the bills 💸, but it also provides plenty of laughable moments 😂. From bizarre coworker habits 🗣️ to office tech that never works when you need it 🖥️, the job world is full of daily comedy gold 🤣. These quotes are perfect for sharing with coworkers who totally get the struggle 🙃. So keep grinding, keep laughing, and remember: sometimes humor is the only bonus you really need 🤪!