50+ Funny Media Quotes That Show The Madness Behind The Headlines

New funny media quotes

• I get so embarrassed for no reason after posting on social media, like, why am I showing my life?

• Ever read a post multiple times, still tilt your head and whisper, “What?!”

• If you’re feeling a little uneasy about the state of global geopolitics, remember to spend as much time on your phone as possible. The more information you ingest as you scroll, the calmer you will become.

• Scrolling the feed as a mature person, not judging anybody.

• I haven’t posted a selfie in a while, but I’m still very cute. Just to keep you updated.

• Scrolling… good take… bad take… nothing take… cyberbullying… beautiful woman.

• Accidentally clicked a post about UFOs, and now my Facebook algorithm thinks I’m a much different person.

• Just because I’m up sharing posts at 7 a.m. doesn’t mean I’m up. Don’t call my phone.

• Social media needs to crash for like a year so everybody can snap back into reality.

• I am MTV, still played music videos, years old.

Top funny media quotes

• Internet strangers offer the best advice.

• If at first you don’t succeed, the internet will let you know immediately.

• I like liking Instagram stories because I like pressing buttons.

• Here I am, block me like a hurricane.

• Adding “Free HBO” to your dating profile isn’t the game changer you’d think it’d be.

• Cats spend two-thirds of their lives sleeping, and the other third making viral videos.

• Most of Twitter could probably use a good bop on the nose with a rolled-up newspaper.

• The collective noun for a group of reply guys is an audacity.

• Pretty annoying when someone unfollows me before I can conduct their exit interview.

• My new coffee table book, “Accidental Screenshots,” is available for pre-order now.

Popular funny media quotes

• I will unfriend, uncousin, unco-worker, unfollow, unfamily any draining soul real quick.

• If anyone is still on Facebook, please check on my parents.

• You are not obligated to post a video of yourself dancing.

• I assume people who bookmark my posts are building a case against me.

• Instead of likes, we should get a little kiss.

• I’ve been blocked, unfollowed, and unfriended, but I’ve never been told I’m bad in bed.

• I’d post more pics, but I don’t want y’all falling in love all at once.

• I’m a social media influencer in that I’ve influenced people to ignore me on social media.

• If anything I post makes you mad, just know that it pleases me.

• The zero likes won’t stop me from posting. I will talk to myself if I have to.

More funny media quotes

• Twitter is the only place where well-articulated sentences still get misinterpreted. You can say “I like pancakes,” and somebody will say, “So you hate waffles?”

• I spend all day on Facebook so that Mark Zuckerberg can eat.

• Please don’t delete your post. Yes, it was pretty stupid, but my reply to it was a masterpiece.

• A man messaged me on Insta and said, “You are not looking bad.” This might be the one, y’all.

• Don’t forget to brush your teeth, comb your hair, cleanse your face, and share my posts.

• Sorry it took so long to text you back; my social bandwidth was buffering.

• Did you guys hear about the “internet”? Apparently, you can say literally anything there.

• Sometimes somebody will share something from way back in my timeline, and I’ll think, “Oh God, what all did they see to get there?”

• Hi, I’m a social media user, you might know me from such hits as “I’m leaving this stupid place” and “I’m back everybody.”

• The porn bots liking my posts from years ago is just reminding me that I’ve always been hilarious.

Witty media quotes

• Keep your friends close, but your smartphone closer.

• When I’m in a good mood, I go to my blocked list and release one or two prisoners.

• Serious replies to silly posts are now illegal. Go talk to your wife.

• It’s crazy how social media convinced us that 15 likes aren’t enough. Imagine 15 people in real life telling you that you looked good.

• A moment of silence for those who hate us but can’t unfriend us because they’re afraid of not knowing what’s happening in our lives.

• Sometimes I read a text and think, “What a psycho.” And then I press send.

• I touched grass today, and I’m still like this. Please advise.

• I don’t text. I will contact you telepathically.

• I want to clarify that what I publish on social media does not define me as a person; I am worse.

• FaceTiming me is for platinum members only.

Funny media quotes remind us that behind every headline is a world of overhype and hilarious twists 🌀. From confusing news cycles 🔄 to sensationalized stories 🤷‍♂️, media keeps us entertained — even when we don’t trust a word of it 😂. These quotes are perfect for anyone who loves poking fun at the 24/7 news machine 🖥️. So grab some popcorn 🍿, enjoy the spectacle, and keep laughing at the never-ending media madness 🤣!