50+ Funny Morning Quotes That Perfectly Capture The Struggle To Wake Up

New funny morning quotes

• I think it’s extremely important, especially in the morning, to be quiet.

• Forget all this adulting stuff, let’s bring back Saturday morning cartoons.

• I can’t wait to retire so I can get up at 6 a.m. and go drive around really slow and make everybody late for work.

• Coffee ain’t gonna cut it today, I need to be chased through the woods by a machete-wielding maniac.

• Just because I’m up sharing posts at 7 a.m. doesn’t mean I’m up. Don’t call my phone.

• People who cook breakfast before going to work are too mature for me.

• Current situation: lying in bed, trying to manifest breakfast.

• My daughter’s morning alarm is less to wake her up, and more to warn the rest of us.

• How can I be expected to get out of bed when I don’t want to?

• I shall have another coffee, for I am sleeping standing.

Top funny morning quotes

• Went to bed with wet hair and woke up looking like I might know a lot about astrophysics.

• I hate when I turn my car on in the morning and the music starts blasting, and I am like, “Whoooah, big fella, I’m not the same person I was last night.”

• Do you ever wake up in the morning and you’re just like… no.

• The older I get, the more I understand why roosters just scream to start their day.

• My morning coffee makes me feel like I’ve got my shit together. I don’t, but it makes me feel like I do.

• The earlier you wake up, the more time you have to think about why you wish you were still asleep in bed.

• I want to be the kind of person who eats half a grapefruit for breakfast and runs every morning, but I also want to be happy.

• Starting your day with an early morning run is a great way to make sure your day can’t get any worse than it started.

• My bathroom mirror after a long party weekend: “Girl, those vitamins can’t help you now.”

• Called in telepathically this morning, so they know I’m thinking of them.

Popular funny morning quotes

• I’m feeling very anxious. I think this 7th mug of coffee will take the edge off.

• Sleep well, middle finger—you’ve got a big day ahead of you tomorrow.

• Life hack: Allow yourself 8–12 hours of alone time every morning to prepare for the day.

• Good morning to everyone who doesn’t get on my nerves.

• I hope the coffee hits harder than reality does.

• I was so locked in, to the point where we were tongue-kissing with morning breath.

• Good morning only to the complexity and uncertainty of everything.

• Even wild things have slow mornings.

• Good morning. May your day be as beautiful as I am.

• At my age, getting up early just means that I had to go pee, and I couldn’t hold it anymore.

More funny morning quotes

• Hate it when my alarm goes off in the morning, and I’m still alive.

• Get a puppy if you are in the market for a best friend who gets you up early so she can bite you excitedly.

• A worm is a pretty disappointing prize for getting up early, if you ask me.

• In a turn of unexpected events, I need to learn karate by tomorrow morning.

• Not sure who needs to hear this, but make your bloody bed.

• Every morning I regret why I didn’t sleep earlier the night before.

• Having a crush is so stupid. Like, why is this dude in my head at 8 am?

• Nothing prepares you for the day you wake up and realize you have a favorite cardigan.

• Why do birds love going apeshit first thing in the morning?

• Good morning to everyone — except me, because I clearly didn’t get enough sleep.

Witty morning quotes

• I woke up, got out of bed, and had coffee. I think that’s enough for one day.

• I don’t rise and shine. I caffeinate and hope.

• Good morning to the wind beneath my wings only.

• You will be having the worst morning of your life and then someone will start mowing their lawn.

• Letting my wife sleep in a little longer for Mother’s Day before we wake her up and ask what’s for breakfast.

• That little stroll to the coffee maker makes me happy every morning.

• I woke up from a deep sleep in a panic thinking I was late for work. Thankfully, I was already there.

• I saw a bird get a worm today. It was about 11 am. So, don’t give up on your dreams, buddy!

• Hey! (with the intention of going back to sleep)

• The day I start waking up early it’s over for you all.

Funny morning quotes remind us that starting the day is rarely as graceful as we imagine 😂. From messy hair moments 🧑‍🦱 to forgetting what day it is 🤷‍♂️, mornings have a special way of keeping us humble and amused 🤣. These quotes are perfect for sharing with anyone who needs a laugh with their first cup of coffee ☕. So embrace the grogginess, laugh at the struggle, and remember: mornings may be tough, but at least they give us something to joke about every single day 😆!