Yeah, I have a drinking problem. It’s called dehydration.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

Feeling lonely? Just glue a coffee cup to the roof of your car. Everyone will wave to you.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

Tupperware is filing for bankruptcy. They would have kept a lid on the news but they couldn’t find one.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has downloaded:

Running feels great until you compare it to not running.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

What many call beauty can just be wiped off 90% of the time.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

I wish companies would use pictures of models looking frazzled and exhausted on their websites, so I can get a real idea of what their clothes will look like on me.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

Life stopped being real after 2019 anyways.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has downloaded:

I woke up deciding to incorporate the parkour lifestyle into my daily life then reconsidered as I fell over again putting my jeans on.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has downloaded:

Imagine you’re on jury duty and the courtroom sketch artist draws stink lines above you.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

Happiness is when you really have nothing to do with people you want absolutely nothing to do with.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

It’s obvious now that democracy is a busted flush and that in future politicians should be selected via several rigorous rounds of Taskmaster.