Someone from has shared:

After all these years, Jude Law has finally noticed me and responded to my love letters. Something about staying 500 feet away. I’m getting it framed.

Someone from has bookmarked:

I have no issue with people talking in the morning. But not with me, please!

Someone from has shared:

If you don’t believe aliens walk amongst us, who else could write such unnatural dialogue in pharmaceutical commercials?

Someone from has downloaded:

Being a consultant would be fun. Like “hmmm… maybe! Here’s your invoice.”

Someone from has bookmarked:

Hey boy, are you the sun? Because you were a big part of my life this summer but now I feel like I never see you.

Someone from has copied:

One thing I will never understand about adulthood is how I’m supposed to make appointments if I work full time and every place closes at 6 p.m.

Someone from has shared:

Opening up to people is a scam. Don’t do it.

Someone from has bookmarked:

The dildo of consequences rarely arrives lubed.

Someone from has downloaded:

When they make a Hate Island, somebody link me.

Someone from has bookmarked:

I’d like to meet the person who decided that if you wanted to get married fast it had to be done by Elvis.