Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I get you, bowel syndrome. I’m irritable, too.
  • It’s so funny how every true crime documentary eventually devolves into a story about how the police botched the entire investigation.
  • Drink coffee, avoid idiots, read books and repeat.
  • Unsolicited sandwich pics.
  • I’m kind of excited about the apocalypse. I would love to eat a basement full of food.
  • She wanted me to impress her in the bedroom, so I showed her my organized sock drawer and my fresh matching bedding.