Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I’m so lazy that I’ll break my tooth trying to get this tag off before I get up and get a scissor.
  • She never lets ideas interrupt the easy flow of her conversation.
  • When people are telling me a story about their life it often reminds me of a much better story from my life.
  • Caught my husband staring at me again. He’s probably weighing his pros and cons.
  • My chess strategy is eating one of your pieces every time you look away.
  • She said she liked animals but apparently all the fruit flies around my apartment was a “turn off”