Trending Funny Quotes πŸ‘‡

  • Just read the Ten Commandments for the first time and you can’t do shit with your neighbor.
  • The sexual tension between my tendency to do something stupid and my resolve not to.
  • Everybody looks like a criminal on the self-checkout camera.
  • My neighbor said he heard me having sex today but it was just me standing in front of my air conditioner.
  • Sorry, my face wasn’t created to hide that much distain for what you’re saying.
  • I was told to be more optimistic so I’ve decided french fries aren’t bad for me.