You should be allowed to leave work early if you miss your wife enough.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

Sorry, but if you’re walking slower than me on the sidewalk, you’re my enemy. Walking faster than me? Also my enemy. Now if you’re walking at the same speed as me… hmm, yeah, I’m thinking enemy.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has shared:

I thought the noise my husband’s stomach was making was never going to end last night until I realized it was a motorbike outside.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

Can’t stand British posts on my timeline. “I bought this for four squids and a halfpenny!” What the hell are you talking about?

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

Flossed the day before a dentist appointment like I was cramming for a history test.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

When your kid asks you where the other parent is, they’re really saying that they’d like to speak with the manager.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

You should be allowed to miss work if you’re not feeling sexy.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has bookmarked:

They give smokers all those breaks to make up for the time taken off their lifespan.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

You can’t tell me there’s anything better than earplugs; I simply will not hear it.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

Saw the eye doctor, and that’s 90% of the vision test right there.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

Sometime you meet such a prince that you’d rather marry the horse.