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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

People on Facebook be like “can anyone tell me about a thing I can easily Google myself?”

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

I’m feeling very anxious. I think this 7th mug of coffee will take the edge off.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

I am “We read the newspaper front to back every single day,” years old.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

There should be a “Take Your Friend to Work Day,” so we can actually see what our friends do all day and meet the characters from all their work stories.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

No need for a Halloween costume this year because there’s nothing scarier than being in your mid-20s and not knowing who you are or what you want to do anymore.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

“Don’t take this the wrong way!” Translation: Prepare for insult.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

Are you spaghetti because I want you to meat my balls?

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

If consuming too much caffeine causes short-term memory loss, just imagine what consuming too much caffeine can do.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

You know it’s bad when people start telling you, you are the strongest person they’ve ever met.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

Dudes be named Will but won’t.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Dec 30, 2025

3,948

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Let’s take a family trip in this beautiful weather so the kids can complain about family, trips, and beautiful weather that has no wifi.

Trending via Messenger:

More dangerous than a lion that roars is a woman gone silent.

Live now on X:

The word aerobics comes from two Greek words: aero, meaning “ability to,” and bics, meaning “withstand tremedous boredom.”

Spotted on Threads:

In case no one told you today. I’m beautiful.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Working on my harmonica skills so those around me can both hear and feel my depression.

Breaking via YouTube:

Someone said I should think before I speak and I said “eww what a horrible way to live”

Live now on Telegram:

You wish you had this many chins.

Going viral on Messenger:

Adulthood these days is just bills and running out of memory on devices.

Trending via WeChat:

I’m tired of adding ‘LOL’ to the end of my texts for sensitive people.

Just shared via WeChat:

I’m ugly but I can make u laugh.

Always be kind. You never know who might own a hot tub.

2 months ago

0

Always be kind. You never know who might own a hot tub.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Remember folks, kindness is key because you never know when you might get that coveted hot tub invite! 🛁😄 So keep spreading those good vibes and who knows, you might just end up soaking in luxury! #KindnessPaysOff #HotTubGoals"

activity, always, friendship, fun, fun activity, gathering, hot, hot tub, kind, kindness, know, never, own, social, social gathering, surprise, tub

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I was gonna brush up against you like a cat, but whatever, bro.

0

4 months ago

bro, brush, casual, cat, humor, i, whatever
I wish that reading books in the park were my job, and I got paid six figures for it.

0

2 months ago

activity, aspiration, books, career, dream, dream job, figures, fun, fun activity, got, i, job, leisure, paid, park, reading, relaxation, six, six figures, wish
I set my alarms extra early to make sure I have enough time to lay in bed and be angry about having to wake up.

0

2 months ago

alarm, angry, bed, early, enough, extra, having, humor, i, lay, management, morning, morning routine, procrastination, routine, set, sure, time, time management, wake, wake up
No, it’s fine. I watched some cartoons and now I feel a little more at ease with your stupidness.

0

2 months ago

cartoons, ease, fine, humor, i, little, relaxation, stupidness
Does anyone else stare at the dead body in movies to see if you can catch them breathing?

0

2 months ago

body, breathing, curiosity, dead, dead body, entertainment, film, funny observation, humor, movie, observation
I had a dream about you. You were stupid there, too.

0

2 months ago

dream, humor, i, joke, relationship, sarcasm, stupid, wit

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

36 shares on X this month:

If you’re going to give me some food for thought, it had better be a pizza, or I’m out.

90 shares on Reddit this month:

Rescuing a cute dog and teaching it how to drive me home from the pub.

98 shares on Slack this month:

I’m only grumpy when I’m awake.

49 shares on TikTok this month:

Trying to eat with my left hand because I need a little excitement in my life.

37 shares on YouTube this month:

Changing my relationship status from “Single” to “I give up.”

32 shares on Reddit this month:

It’s like ten thousand tweets when all you need is a life.

44 shares on Telegram this month:

The modern condition is mostly trying to do things on your own that people have historically achieved with a large support network, and wondering why you’re tired all the time.

42 shares on Reddit this month:

If Kanye got hacked, no one would even know.

57 shares on X this month:

I was having a great day, and then, people.

85 shares on YouTube this month:

Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Why would I work from home when I don’t even work from work?

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I ran out of toilet paper so I had to start using old newspapers. The Times are rough.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

One of the great joys in this life is looking at your pet’s weird little teeth.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Who else here can say that they have NEVER watched any of the Kardashian shows?

12 folks are currently checking 👀

If you drink a lot of water, you won’t have time for other people’s drama because you’ll be too busy looking for a bathroom.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Saturday Night Fever, but it’s just me yelling, “Five, six, seven, eight!” while my cat lies down and refuses to participate.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve never really had a beach body, but my snowman body is coming along quite nicely.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

When you want to key his car, but he doesn’t have one, so you bend his bus pass.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Was already at my breaking point, and then had to use the authenticator app.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Twitter is the only place you argue with CEOs and heads of states while sleeping in the kitchen.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

643 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,236

Funny Quotes Topics

17,359

Funny Quotes Images

15,236

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

3,703

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

No president next term. America needs to be single for a while to focus on herself.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

I miss my Dad opening the windows and talking about cross-ventilation.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has bookmarked:

No, they’re not “symptoms of depressions.” They’re Blue’s Clues.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

Imagine hating me and I don’t notice.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Ladies, if a man says he will fix something, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months about it.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

I love when my cat sighs at me, like what’s got you stressed out my little freeloading homicidal maniac!?

Someone from 🇱🇺 has downloaded:

It’s always annoying to be woken up by some guy mowing his lawn. Just go around me, man.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

I miss the old days back in 1955, when I didn’t exist.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

I hate it when I do the math about where my money went, and it all adds up. No one robbed me; I didn’t lose it. It was really all me.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

Might mess around and reply “history will absolve me” to all work emails.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WeChat:

You can’t spell crypto without “cry”.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Incense sticks are just disappointing sparklers.

Just landed via X:

If I don’t duck my head when I drive into the parking garage, what’s gonna keep my car from hitting the ceiling?

Spotted on Facebook:

Talents: eating!

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I have a sundress and no man to bend me over in it, sad day.

Seen just now on Slack:

When you turn 50, they change the lightbulb in your fridge to that memory eraser from Men in Black.

Live now on Snapchat:

I made soup while whispering “He was never mine,” like it’s 1893, and I just lost my beloved to a duel.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I took a pole and found that 100% of people in the tent were angry.

Spotted on Instagram:

Reoccurring dreams be like: ‘I dunno, here’s a rerun’

Live now on Twitch:

Getting ghosted by someone who bothered you in the first place is crazy.

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