Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

I could tell by the way she was pouring gasoline on a pile of my clothes that the relationship had hit some turbulence.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

Of all her outfits, my shirt and no underwear will always be my favorite.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

A babysitter is a teenager who acts like an adult while the adults go out to act like teenagers.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

Wow, pretty rude for people to exist who are younger and hotter than me, but OK.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has shared:

My doctor no longer prescribes me Viagra. He just left me hanging.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

A frittata is just an omelette for people too lazy to flip things.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

Dear recipe websites. I don’t need your life story. Just give me the recipe.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

Welcome to middle age. You now take pictures of instructions so you can enlarge them.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

Me (young, naive): “I hope something good happens.” Me (now): “I hope whatever bad happens is at least funny.”

Someone from 🇸🇲 has viewed:

Dating apps are no place for meeting your soulmate. The best way to find your soulmate is to tweet really good.