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Commentary:
"Imagine being a cat and having your humans obsess over your bathroom habits like it's the latest reality TV show 🙀💩 Talk about living under surveillance 24/7! Maybe cats have secret meetings plotting how to prank us in retaliation for all the poop monitoring 😹 #CatConspiracy"

animal, animal behavior, behavior, cat, cats, funny observation, harvesting, humor, observation, pets, poop, think, weird

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I don’t care about life on other planets. I don’t even have a life on this one.

1 month ago
care, even, existence, humor, i, irony, life, perspective, planet, planets, self-deprecation
If I could be in two places at once, I’d be in bed twice.

1 month ago
bed, humor, i, ID, places, relaxation, sleep, twice
Having a bathroom switch outside a bathroom and a sibling is a bad combination.

1 month ago
bad, bathroom, combination, having, household, humor, inconvenience, joke, outside, practical, practical joke, sibling, switch
So apparently they don’t count as sit-ups if you’re just trying to get out of bed.

1 month ago
bed, count, exercise, humor, just, motivation, sit-up, struggle, trying
Let’s be honest. The best moment of the day is when we take off our bra.

1 month ago
best, best moment, bra, comfort, day, honesty, humor, moment, relaxation, take
Helvetica is my favorite font that sounds like a heavy metal band.

1 month ago
band, favorite, font, heavy, heavy metal, Helvetica, humor, joke, metal, sounds, typography

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

I don’t know who needs to hear this but you’re not dying, it’s just Monday.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

The economy’s so tough, people out here eating grass — matcha.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

Another fine day ruined by waking up.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

If I ever die on some hill, rest assured, something fishy is going on.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has downloaded:

Twitter is like a psych ward with no staff.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

Everyone is using AI to write business emails, texts, etc. At this point in time, we may as well just tell our AIs to talk to each other and then let us know what kind of deal they worked out.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

My house was clean yesterday. Sorry, you missed it.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

I wonder if this next thunderstorm is thinking of me, too.

Just landed via Pinterest:

God: “You can’t just say ‘Goddammit!’ and expect Me to damn it. There’s a procedure. File the paperwork.”

Just shared via Discord:

I stopped writing “Feel free to reach out if you need anything else” at the end of my emails because please don’t do that.

Just shared via X:

Being single is so crazy. What do you mean there’s No One?

Live now on Facebook:

I can’t decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life, or they are living it to the fullest.

Trending via YouTube:

No one knows what I’m up to, not even me.

Breaking via Snapchat:

Don’t forget to be mean to strangers on the internet today, for no reason whatsoever.

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Cats must think we’re so weird for constantly harvesting their poop.

I don’t care about life on other planets. I don’t even have a life on this one.

If I could be in two places at once, I’d be in bed twice.

Having a bathroom switch outside a bathroom and a sibling is a bad combination.

So apparently they don’t count as sit-ups if you’re just trying to get out of bed.

Let’s be honest. The best moment of the day is when we take off our bra.

Helvetica is my favorite font that sounds like a heavy metal band.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

I wasn’t feeling well so I googled my symptoms. I either have allergies or I died two days ago.

Imagine marrying an old man for money and you die first.

Finally gathered all my thoughts and now they’re jumping me.

That moment when you clean the apartment and a year later everything is dirty again.

Nothing has paid off less than learning to do the Macarena.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

In the 80s, you could literally shrink your kids with a shrink-ray, and your wife wouldn’t divorce you. I’m pretty sure I saw a documentary film about it.

Googling phone numbers you don’t recognize instead of actually answering the phone.

Silk is a crazy material. “I like your shirt,” thanks. It came out of a bug.

Maturing is when you’d rather drink your bourbon half-naked on the couch than go out.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

No, I wasn’t dancing. I got harassed by a bumble bee.

You could go camping or you could stay at home, not shower, leave dirt on the floor and let some squirrels in.

An orgy where everyone looks identical is called a doppelgängerbänger.

Mornings would be fine if they started later.

Decorated the house across the street so I can look out the window and enjoy my handiwork.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Autumn is when men run around like it’s summer and women like it’s winter.

Pinterest algorithm is like a loving dad who fills the whole fridge with oranges after seeing you enjoy one.

I like that they put all that stuff outside for you to look at when you’re on a walk.

My grandmother is a shining example of how you can live until 90 years of age, sustained by nothing but spite and biscuits.

My neighbor said he heard me having sex today but it was just me standing in front of my air conditioner.

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Cats must think we’re so weird for constantly harvesting their poop.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I don’t care about life on other planets. I don’t even have a life on this one.

If I could be in two places at once, I’d be in bed twice.

Having a bathroom switch outside a bathroom and a sibling is a bad combination.

So apparently they don’t count as sit-ups if you’re just trying to get out of bed.

Let’s be honest. The best moment of the day is when we take off our bra.

Helvetica is my favorite font that sounds like a heavy metal band.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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