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Commentary:
"Ah, the ultimate movie-watching challenge: playing detective to catch those pesky breathing actors in action! Who knew being nosy could be so morbidly entertaining?"

body, breathing, curiosity, dead, dead body, entertainment, film, funny observation, humor, movie, observation

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Runners who smoke need to pick a side.

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2 months ago

contradiction, fitness, humor, need, pick, runner, side, smoke, smoking
Someone at work is gonna suggest you download Outlook and Teams on your phone, and it’s very important that you don’t listen to them.

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2 days ago

advice, communication, download, humor, important, listen, outlook, phone, someone, Teams, technology, work
Nothing says, “I love you,” like an echo chamber.

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2 months ago

chamber, communication, echo, echo chamber, humor, i, irony, love, nothing, relationship, sarcasm
“I’m too young to be forgetting why I walked into a room.”

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5 months ago

adult, aging, confusion, forgetfulness, forgetting, humor, i, memory, room, too, walking, why, young, young adult
If I’m not spoken to, my morning grumpiness goes almost unnoticed.

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2 months ago

grumpiness, humor, morning, spoken, unnoticed, unspoken
Before you have kids, ask yourself: how patient am I with really stupid people?

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2 months ago

am, ask, before, humor, i, kids, parenting, patience, patient, people, self-reflection, stupid, yourself

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

82 shares on Slack this month:

I want Wolverine claws. Not for violence or anything. I want them for easing my way through reality. Like opening an Amazon package.

76 shares on Reddit this month:

I get it dogs, I wish I could also bark at strangers approaching my house.

45 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I touched grass today, and I’m still like this. Please advise.

76 shares on Discord this month:

I’m upstairs and the food is downstairs. Send help.

87 shares on YouTube this month:

Please pray for my daughter, who had to empty the dishwasher when she “just did this yesterday and she’s tired.”

31 shares on Snapchat this month:

I talk a lot of shit for someone who turns every black shirt into an abstract deodorant mural.

56 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Sorry, I’m late. My alarm didn’t go off because I didn’t set it, because I don’t want to be here.

19 shares on Facebook this month:

“You win some. You lose some.” Me, after losing for the millionth time in a row.

38 shares on Instagram this month:

If I have to look at any more spreadsheets today, you’re gonna have to spread my ashes.

49 shares on Reddit this month:

Me drinking green tea: this is going to fix everything.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

When you scream into your pillow, the memory foam never forgets.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

Sometimes I just want a man to talk to me in the same voice he uses to talk to his dog.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

They’re called grown-ups because they groan every time they get up.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

Unfortunately, I have the paper towel habit of a much wealthier woman.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

Screen time so high, I should send another risky message and then ignore my cell phone for three days.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

This meeting could have been an unread email.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

Life is a highway and I’m afraid to merge.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

I’ve got to start taking better care of myself. Tomorrow I’ll walk to the liquor store.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

Don’t forget to have an orgasm today. Partner is optional. Pleasure is not.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

I like to describe the difference between theory and practice with shopping lists and receipts.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Pinterest:

Worst feeling in the world is when you are loyal to all your girlfriends but your favorite one is cheating on you.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Obviously, I’m gonna upload pictures with filters and in my best angles. If you wanna see the ugly side of me, come to my house, but bring ice cream.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Does anyone else stare at the dead body in movies to see if you can catch them breathing?

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Runners who smoke need to pick a side.

Someone at work is gonna suggest you download Outlook and Teams on your phone, and it’s very important that you don’t listen to them.

Nothing says, “I love you,” like an echo chamber.

“I’m too young to be forgetting why I walked into a room.”

If I’m not spoken to, my morning grumpiness goes almost unnoticed.

Before you have kids, ask yourself: how patient am I with really stupid people?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨