Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

Cats spend two-thirds of their lives sleeping, and the other third making viral videos.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

We’re so close to “Let’s circle back next year” season, I can taste it.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has copied:

The only reason to engage with a neighbor is if either of you is on fire.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

Being silly is very important for my mental health.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

I don’t assume anything except the fetal position.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

There I was, quietly reliving my dream of having my own house, when suddenly I was attacked by insane prices.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Getting left on read really gives me perspective on what Nigerian princes go through.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

Every squad has that person who has to go home early.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

My hair will never allow me to commit any crime; I leave my DNA everywhere.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

I will always be hotter than everyone who hates me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

615 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,208

Funny Quotes Topics

17,340

Funny Quotes Images

15,208

Updated

Dec 30, 2025

Users Online

4,068

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Telegram:

Pretending to be a well-adjusted, functioning adult is so exhausting.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Don’t you hate it when you offer help and the other person says yes?

Live now on Messenger:

Currently helping my kids find the chocolate that I ate last night.

Just shared via WeChat:

Sometimes, u just gotta clean your room and apply an elaborate skincare routine, and pretend that’s equivalent to getting ur life in order.

Going viral on YouTube:

Adulting is difficult. One minute you’re proud of yourself, the next minute you feel like you’re not doing enough.

Going viral on Messenger:

Scrolling should count as cardio.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Is this art or trash?

Seen just now on Twitch:

I hate when cashiers feel the need to check if my money is real. If I could make counterfeit money, I wouldn’t be at the Dollar Tree, Karen.

Breaking via Messenger:

“It could be drugs,” I tell myself as I buy more books.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

The older I get, the more I start to understand the appeal of birdwatching as a hobby. I do find myself watching these little troublemakers quite often.

“Don’t bite the hand that feeds you!” Maybe just don’t bite hands. Shouldn’t have to qualify it.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Words of wisdom: Don't bite hands, folks. Keep those pearly whites in check! 🤭🦷 #NoHandBiting"

advice, bite, context, feeds, hand, hands, humor, just, qualify

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Video games are great. They let you try out your craziest fantasies. For example, on The Sims, you can have a job and a house.

0

2 months ago

activity, creativity, example, fantasy, fun, fun activity, game, games, great, house, job, let, Sims, simulation, The Sims, try, video, video game
It probably feels so good to ram your head into something as a cat.

0

2 months ago

activity, behavior, cat, feeling, fun, fun activity, good, good feeling, head, playful, playful behavior, ram
Hey beauty brands who make face creams: 30ml is only enough for an ant’s face.

0

2 months ago

ant, ants, beauty, beauty brand, brand, cream, face, face cream, humor, product, size, skincare
It’s called shitposting, Your Honor. You should try it sometimes; it’s liberating.

0

3 months ago

court, honor, humor, internet, internet slang, judge, liberating, liberation, shitposting, should, slang, sometimes, try
All I’ve ever wanted is to look good naked, hope that someone can take it.

0

2 months ago

body, body image, confidence, desire, ever, good, hope, humor, image, look good, naked, someone, take, wanted
Airport security asked me if I’ve seen anything unusual. I just paid $18 for a coke & a sandwich. Let’s start with that.

0

2 months ago

airport, anything, asked, coke, expensive, food, food pricing, humor, i, joke, just, me, paid, pricing, sandwich, security, seen, start, travel, unusual

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

23 shares on Snapchat this month:

If you start a sentence with “Let me reiterate…”, I’m gonna ignore it the second time too.

39 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m writing a parenting book called ‘Kids won’t listen until you scream like your mother did’.

35 shares on Snapchat this month:

Smash Mouth was so right, the years really do start coming and they don’t stop coming.

65 shares on Threads this month:

I would just once like to feel as powerful as a toddler throwing their sippy cup whilst sitting atop their high chair.

51 shares on Slack this month:

I’m not flirting with you. I’m just funny and you think you like me.

57 shares on Facebook this month:

Me, telling my kids we’re leaving in 30 minutes: We’re leaving in 5 minutes.

21 shares on Instagram this month:

Being bilingual means stuttering in both languages.

80 shares on Pinterest this month:

They should make a biopic of just some random guy.

80 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I do not like how Netflix threatens to start the movie while I’m just tryna read the description. Like, please, you’re making me anxious.

78 shares on Reddit this month:

I wish I could put an AirTag on my sanity.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

I’m just saying, no dog has ever ghosted me.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

You’re acting up? Right before Santa Claus comes to town? Unbelievable.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

I downloaded a meditation app. Now I’m stressed about missing sessions.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has shared:

I’m not being smart, I’m just a skilled trained professional in pointing out the obvious.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

That awkward shopping moment when someone is standing in front of the items you need and you pretend you’re shopping for something else because they just won’t budge.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

For once, I would just like to underthink a situation. How do you guys do that?

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

I had a Russian Uber driver the other day. His name was Pikup Andropov.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

The marriage rate has been trending downward. Choreographed wedding dances may be the reason.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has copied:

People be like “I love your energy” – then drain it.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

The gaps in my resume are from the space bar.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via TikTok:

This year has gone by so quick. Christmas is basically tomorrow.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Accidentally said I was on a diet instead of in a calorie deficit, and now everyone knows I’m from the 1900s.

Going bananas on Facebook:

I think something is so beautifully wrong with you.

Making waves on Slack:

Signing all emails with BOOM SHAKALAKA today.

Seen just now on Threads:

Nothing really prepares you for when your favorite sweatpants begin to fall apart.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

You can tell Monopoly is an old game because there’s a luxury tax, and rich people can go to jail.

Spotted on YouTube:

People who often talk to themselves are more intelligent than others. At least that’s what I tell myself.

Trending via Slack:

The volume of my TV is 100% dependent on what I’m currently chewing on.

Making waves on Messenger:

I don’t like this new trend of old people wearing shirts of bands I listened to when I was a kid.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

“I’m basically the human version of finding $20 in old jeans.”

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

“Don’t bite the hand that feeds you!” Maybe just don’t bite hands. Shouldn’t have to qualify it.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Video games are great. They let you try out your craziest fantasies. For example, on The Sims, you can have a job and a house.

It probably feels so good to ram your head into something as a cat.

Hey beauty brands who make face creams: 30ml is only enough for an ant’s face.

It’s called shitposting, Your Honor. You should try it sometimes; it’s liberating.

All I’ve ever wanted is to look good naked, hope that someone can take it.

Airport security asked me if I’ve seen anything unusual. I just paid $18 for a coke & a sandwich. Let’s start with that.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨