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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

My favorite yoga pose is the one where you eat a sandwich.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

I’m accused of being a plagiarist. Their words, not mine.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

Every Jurassic Park movie should end with an insurance adjuster getting a phone call and immediately throwing up.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

That “never again” talk with yourself after a certain experience is always funny.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has downloaded:

According to this box of macaroni and cheese, I am an entire family.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

Hobosexual. A person who dates you with the sole interest of having a place to stay.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

I set my alarms extra early to make sure I have enough time to lay in bed and be angry about having to wake up.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

“23 and Me” is how Leonardo DiCaprio RSVPs for events.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

I am not old. I am in the prime of my decay.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

I failed as a person; I’m a dinosaur now.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2246 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,408

Funny Quotes Topics

15,116

Funny Quotes Images

12,408

2 hours ago

3,456

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Discord:

All I’m saying is that I’m closer to being a millionaire than Jeff Bezos is.

Trending via Threads:

Yes officer, I’d like to file a restraining order against my dentist’s appointment reminder system.

Freshly posted on Threads:

I was born to be wild, but only until around 9pm or so.

Live now on Pinterest:

I hate dealing with fresh garlic. Each individual clove with their little f***ing paperwork.

Just shared via Threads:

The incontinent optimist sees the bladder as half empty.

Freshly posted on Slack:

My cold is worse than yours because it’s happening to me.

Live now on Facebook:

How soon into a new relationship should you let her know you’re an idiot?

Shared recently on Twitch:

Having a pool is so neat. All of your friends are suddenly interested to catch up on the hottest days of the year.

Making waves on TikTok:

If GPT-5 will have ‘Ph.D.-level intelligence’, then GPT-6 will have the intelligence of someone who decided not to get a PhD.

Spotted on Slack:

If a woman watches a TV show alone, who answers all of her questions?

Don’t buy roses for her, buy chicken nuggets. Show her you really care.

5 months ago

Don’t buy roses for her, buy chicken nuggets. Show her you really care.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Who needs roses when you can have nuggets? Because nothing says 'I love you' like a crispy, golden token of affection. Forget the flowers, let those nuggets do the talking – and trust me, they speak the language of deliciousness!"

care, chicken, chicken nugget, chicken nuggets, date, food, gift, humor, love, nugget, relationship, rose, show

Response

Username: StarryNomad Full Name:

Feb 25, 2025

Absolutely! 🙌🏼 Nothing beats the way to a woman’s heart like a 20-piece nugget. Because true love isn’t diamond rings, it’s dipping sauces. 🍗🍟🍔+❤️= Forever 😂💯.

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2246 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,408

Funny Quotes Topics

15,116

Funny Quotes Images

12,408

2 hours ago

3,430

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

Time to get off the internet, I’ve already had enough stupid for the week.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

Some people you look at or hear talking and think to yourself, the wheel may be turning, but the hamster is dead.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

Fishing for compliments like “I’m a mess in this photo that I took all morning to get the right angle and filter and after 50 selfies this is me”.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has downloaded:

I’m so good at sleeping that I can do it with my eyes closed.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

Stop checking up on your friends, and check up on me.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

I prayed and accidentally mixed up God and Lord and said Gord. So embarrassing.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

Meds have done more for me than any man ever could.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

Technology has really helped me waste my time efficiently.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

None of this matters and we are all going to die. Have a great weekend!

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

I don’t know which aunty needs to hear this, but focus on your own child.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

I have three kids. I should be terrified of sex.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

I’m like if a birthday card with no money inside was a person.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Even at my most evil, I’m considerate.

Reported on Snapchat:

When a girl says “5 mins,” think about it like five minutes left in the 4th quarter, and both teams have all their timeouts.

Just shared via YouTube:

“I’m like Sisyphus but with dishes. Dishyphus.”

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Wonder if I should do something with my life, or kind of just continue to hang out.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I might not put the sparkle in your eyes, but I’ll definitely put the “WTF” wrinkles in your forehead.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

There should be a tented fingers emoji. For when you’re feeling ruminative.

Reported on Reddit:

Pronouncing hyperbole like guacamole.

Spotted on Reddit:

Make every hug more interesting by mysteriously whispering, “the Dark Lord stands at the crossroads!”

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