Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Oh, the universe must be rolling its cosmic eyes at you, waiting for the sign to have its own sign! 🙄🌌 Don't worry, maybe it'll come with flashing lights and a big neon arrow next time! ⚡🔜 #SignierSignNeeded"

cosmic, every, humor, i, me, okay, patience, sign, signs, think, time, universe, wait, waiting

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I bet it feels so good for a cat to headbutt someone they adore.

0

4 months ago

adore, affection, behavior, bet, cat, feels, funny observation, good, headbutt, i, observation, pet, pet behavior, someone
Naps are like gambling for the tired. You either wake up refreshed or too late to lots of angry texts.

0

2 months ago

angry, angry text, gambling, humor, late, nap, naps, refreshed, sleep, text, texts, timing, tired, too, wake
Dear phone, if you didn’t light up so many times to tell me you had a low battery, you wouldn’t have died so quickly!

0

2 months ago

battery, death, died, frustration, humor, light, low, low battery, me, notifications, phone, technology, tell, times
Matcha. Dubai chocolate. Jealousy. Green is back in a big way, and likely due to deforestation.

0

2 months ago

back, big, chocolate, deforestation, Dubai, Dubai chocolate, due, environmental, environmental humor, green, humor, irony, jealousy, matcha
Get married and have kids so that you can Google things like “How to teach your kid to not bite”.

0

2 months ago

advice, behavior, bite, child, child behavior, Google, humor, kid, kids, marriage, married, parenting, teach, things
Going down a rabbit hole if anyone wants anything.

0

2 months ago

adventure, anything, curiosity, exploration, fun, going, hole, rabbit, rabbit hole, request, wants

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

22 shares on Discord this month:

My favorite childhood memory is not paying bills.

69 shares on WeChat this month:

Why would I go to my high school reunion? I didn’t want to be there the first time.

41 shares on Facebook this month:

Go ahead and use that semi-colon; no one will know you’re doing it wrong.

68 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Sorry I can’t come today. My sister’s friend’s mother’s grandpa’s brother’s grandson’s uncle’s fish died, and it was tragic.

50 shares on Pinterest this month:

If you like pointing out beautiful scenery to three people who are on their phones, a family road trip is for you.

36 shares on X this month:

A simple “hi” can be the beginning of two years of therapy.

49 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Ginger ale is the champagne of soda.

81 shares on TikTok this month:

The trouble with living alone is that it’s always my turn to do the dishes.

65 shares on Reddit this month:

I’m actually pretty attractive, if you don’t compare me to anyone, ever.

93 shares on Twitch this month:

I hate managing money, I was born to splurge.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

Dating apps? No thanks, if I wanted to talk to someone for hours and accomplish nothing, I’d contact tech support.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

The worst thing you can do when you notice your kids are playing nicely together is telling them that they’re playing nicely together.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

Car naps hit different, especially when you are the one driving.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

Maybe in another universe, I punched him in the face instead of staying quiet.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

Just because you are unique, doesn’t mean you are useful.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

Most men will receive their first bunch of flowers at their funeral.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has copied:

Aging is the worst. I miss the good ol’ days when my pain was strictly emotional.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

His hands wouldn’t stop talking to me, your honor.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

Just seen the cost of funerals and no wonder people are living longer.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has viewed:

My ideal workday would be from 9:00 AM to 9:07 AM

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Threads:

I’m always sad when my sandwich is over.

Trending via Messenger:

I miss my Dad opening the windows and talking about cross-ventilation.

Making waves on Twitch:

People who say “teamwork makes the dream work” are the reason that some people want to punch other people in the face.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Sorry for texting you back instantly. My phone was in my hand, and I’m mature and actually like you.

Shared recently on Discord:

I love replying to people within seconds. Hello. I am here. Always.

Spotted on Discord:

Sometimes, before bedtime, I fall asleep on the couch. It’s my little sleep appetizer… my nappetizer.

Just landed via Instagram:

The advantage of being an identical twin: you only need one gym contract.

Breaking via X:

Today I bought a doughnut without sprinkles. This diet thing is hard.

Going bananas on YouTube:

Handyman to customer: If I had wanted you to watch me work, I would have become an actor.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Another day waiting, and wishing, and wanting.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Every time the universe sends me a sign, I’m like, okay, but I think I’ll wait for a signier sign.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I bet it feels so good for a cat to headbutt someone they adore.

Naps are like gambling for the tired. You either wake up refreshed or too late to lots of angry texts.

Dear phone, if you didn’t light up so many times to tell me you had a low battery, you wouldn’t have died so quickly!

Matcha. Dubai chocolate. Jealousy. Green is back in a big way, and likely due to deforestation.

Get married and have kids so that you can Google things like “How to teach your kid to not bite”.

Going down a rabbit hole if anyone wants anything.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨