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Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡ณ has downloaded:

My wife asked me why the bottle of wine we bought yesterday was half empty. I said because she is a pessimist.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has shared:

I’ve just found my wide pants again. They weren’t gone at all, they’re just my tight pants now.

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I think you would all treat me a lot better if I possessed a small amount of plutonium.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ฎ has downloaded:

I donโ€™t understand people who forget to eat. Iโ€™m already planning lunch while chewing breakfast.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡ญ has copied:

When you said โ€œletโ€™s circle back to that in the new yearโ€ and now itโ€™s the new year.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ฌ has bookmarked:

The great thing about having pet insurance is that while our dachshund is at the vets, they’ve given us a courtesy poodle to hang out with.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ง has copied:

I hate it when Iโ€™m at work and someone asks โ€œare you at free at the moment?โ€. Please expand further so I can know if Iโ€™m free or not.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡ฆ has shared:

It’s cool that women want me, but it makes me sad that fish fear me.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ง has viewed:

Whoever told you thereโ€™s no such thing as a stupid question lied.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ฎ has viewed:

Living your life to the fullest does not have to involve selfies with bison.

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Excuse me, but would you sign my petition to ban petitions?

Excuse me, but would you sign my petition to ban petitions?

Commentary:
"Excuse me, but would you sign my petition to ban petitions? ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿ“ Because who needs all that paper-pushing when we can just wave some magic wands and make things happen?! โœจ #PetitionCeption #BanTheBanPetition"



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