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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

The lion is starting to concern himself with things he’s been trying to ignore.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

Lasagna has never broken my heart. Just saying.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

I’m not sure what everyone at my coworking space does for work, but I’m pretty sure one guy’s job is chewing.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

They say time is the solution to every problem. I’ve been waiting for five hours already and the room is still messy.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

I like how the Tooth Fairy got the job, and then subbed it out to everyone’s parents. That’s called “business savvy.”

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

If I’m ever murdered, I don’t want two women with a podcast solving the case in their spare time.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has viewed:

Just saw someone my age running and she wasn’t chasing an ice-cream truck.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

A good rule to remember for life is that when it comes to plastic surgery and sushi, never be attracted by a bargain.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

I may not know what’s going on, but I also have no idea what’s happening.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

If your god commands you to kill others, find another god.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

791 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,953

Funny Quotes Topics

13,925

Funny Quotes Images

10,953

Updated

22 minutes ago

Users Online

3,429

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

Girls these days are like a box of chocolates. Some have nuts.

Trending via Snapchat:

In a turn of unexpected events, I need to learn karate by tomorrow morning.

Seen just now on X:

Donuts hug you from the inside.

Spotted on Discord:

I like that they put all that stuff outside for you to look at when you’re on a walk.

Going viral on Discord:

I’m not deleting my Twitter, I was here before Elon.

Freshly posted on Slack:

The best part of the relationship is before you meet them, and you’re single.

Breaking via Discord:

Sunday night: Super Bowl party! Monday morning: Toilet Bowl party!

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I don’t get treadmills, I mean if I walk I better reach somewhere.

Reported on X:

I’m so cold, I wish I could get in the dryer.

Shared recently on X:

The children seemed disappointed when I told them the best part about being an adult is going to bed early.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

791 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,953

Funny Quotes Topics

13,925

Funny Quotes Images

10,953

Updated

22 minutes ago

Users Online

3,439

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

Flossed the day before a dentist appointment like I was cramming for a history test.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

A Southerner dies every time you people type “ya’ll” instead of “y’all,” btw.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

Heartbreaking: Introvert sentenced to 100 hours of hanging out.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

Sick of people thinking the Midwest is just a bunch of small towns and cornfields when they forgot it’s also a lot of road construction, inconsistent weather, and deer that jump in front of your car.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

Aging gracefully is like getting steamrolled gracefully, you should really be screaming.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

I think it’s time I find myself a new inspiration, asking myself “what would Batman do?” gets me in too much trouble.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

Any time I have ever uttered the phrase “no worries” I have been lying. There are many worries.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

I was very disappointed when I found out drinking alcohol doesn’t actually kill brain cells, I was hoping to join a political party one day.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

There’s a great new book on minimalism but I only read the blurb because I believe that’s what the author would want.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

I can’t decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life, or they are living it to the fullest.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on X:

I love when my husband says, “correct me if I’m wrong,” like I would pass up that opportunity.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

My Facebook friends are like my pen collection. I have 100 but only one writes.

Going viral on Telegram:

Your twenties are for working towards a life you later won’t want.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Technically, the Friday after July 4 isn’t a holiday. But I think we all know that Americans have a constitutional right to take the fifth.

Making waves on WeChat:

Vacation is a time when every part of you can relax except your bowels.

Going viral on Twitch:

I will never trust a cake transport box enough to just hold it by the handle.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Why would I spend money on the zoo when I can watch my colleagues for free?

Trending via Facebook:

My hair dryer is so powerful that it doubles as my leaf blower.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I wonder if my date ever found her way out of that corn maze.

Live now on X:

The best time to start a family fight is now. It gets you out of buying relatives gifts.

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