Someone from has viewed:

Landlord: I’m raising your rent. Me: Am I getting a bigger house?

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I don’t understand how I can remember every word of a song from 1984, but I can’t remember why I walked into the kitchen.

Someone from has copied:

I’m afraid to go to therapy — what if they fix me and I lose my funny?

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My dogs have learned that whenever they hear the f-word in the kitchen, there’s now food on the floor.

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Feeling morally and spiritually adrift without a Sunday HBO show.

Someone from has bookmarked:

Since emojis have been around, I finally have a rough idea of how women feel when they don’t know what to wear.

Someone from has bookmarked:

The future is buffering.

Someone from has downloaded:

You’re really hot. Wanna share microplastics?

Someone from has shared:

Scooby-Doo led me to believe that if I were ever really scared, I should run super-fast in place.

Someone from has downloaded:

Nothing flies faster than the ketchup out of the bottle when you only want a little.