Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇰 has viewed:

“I’m asking Santa to bring some of you a sense of humor for Christmas.”

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

I got one brain cell left and it moves around my head like a Windows screensaver.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

Betrayal only comes from someone we’re close to. Just like herpes.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

I am like the weather. Temporarily friendly.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

Mrs. Doubtfire is my favorite movie about violating a custody agreement.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

I asked my doctor if I’m healthy enough for sex and he told me I’m not even sexy enough for health.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

Sorry for what I said when I was drunk. I meant every word.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

Grammar is important. It’s the difference between feeling your nuts and feeling you’re nuts.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has shared:

So basically, companies pay YouTube to show ads, and we pay YouTube to not show ads.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

Doing some skin care routine but my skin doesn’t care.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,524

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on TikTok:

69. Some might call it nasty. I call it a romantic dinner for 2.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Many people mistakenly believe that diamond is the hardest substance on earth, but in reality it is my husband’s stubborn head.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Unlike the brain, the stomach alerts you when it’s empty.

Trending via WeChat:

I do believe in aliens, but do they also believe in me?

Shared recently on Instagram:

Being a writer means knowing exactly how your story ends, and having absolutely no idea how to get there.

Shared recently on Twitch:

My daughter asked me what it’s like to be a parent, so I woke her up at 3 AM to let her know that I couldn’t sleep.

Trending via Messenger:

Your secret is safe with me because I don’t care.

Making waves on Telegram:

Marriage is scary, what if he doesn’t want our house to look like my Pinterest board.

Just landed via Threads:

Tried to be a responsible adult today. Won’t be doing that again.

Making waves on Facebook:

Adults are always asking children what they want to be when they grow up because they’re looking for ideas.

I can’t decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life, or they are living it to the fullest.

2 weeks ago

Witty quote about pajamas in public, blending humor and playful life choices.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
🤔💭 "The eternal debate: Are public pajamas a fashion faux pas or a bold declaration of comfort supremacy? 🛌💁‍♂️ Either way, these pajama pioneers are truly keeping us on our toes… or should I say, on our slippers! 🦶👖 #PajamaParty"

comfort, decision, fashion, humor, i, irony, life, living, norms, pajamas, people, public, social, social norms

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Social Media Stars ⭐

24 shares on Instagram this month:

This whole week could have been an email.

95 shares on X this month:

I disagree with everyone and think relationships should be easy.

100 shares on Telegram this month:

My rock bottom keeps refreshing.

52 shares on Twitch this month:

The cheapest way to fly is off the handle.

65 shares on WeChat this month:

I want to be so rich that when I see a spider in my house I won’t kill it, I’d buy another house.

19 shares on WeChat this month:

I still can’t believe Aldi sells shopping carts for 25 cents. I’ve got 8 of them now and don’t really even have a use for them, it was just too good of a deal to pass up.

84 shares on Slack this month:

I do not like FaceTime unless we’re best friends or I’m in love with you.

50 shares on YouTube this month:

I respect the moon’s unwillingness to be photographed on a phone.

22 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Men love to show you a YouTube video. It is a sign of deep respect in their culture.

44 shares on Snapchat this month:

There is still plenty of room in my heart, but the bouncer has become a little stricter in recent years.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t think people are actually getting any dumber. I think stupid people have just become way more confident.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I just love the lack of privacy in the pharmacy line. Just standing there shouting out my name, date of birth, and exactly what is wrong with me for the world to hear.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Every once in a while, I go outside and run the vacuum cleaner on the driveway, just to make sure the neighbors never talk to me.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Job market so bad, I started following my dreams.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I can’t keep up anymore. Happy birthday to everyone for the rest of your life.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Good morning, especially if they tried to make you go to rehab and you said “no, no, no.”

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Every time I talk, it sounds like it’s my first time trying to speak.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

What if aliens watch our movies about aliens and then invade accordingly in hopes of fitting in with our culture?

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate when flies rub their disgusting little hands together. What could you possibly be plotting? You can’t even get out of the open window.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

What’s the best job for someone who cries very easily and cannot handle any criticism?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,547

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

Ants can be found on every continent except Antarctica, which is weird considering their name.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

Updating my resume. Anyone got a more professional word for “dumpster fire”?

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

Why would I work from home when I don’t even work from work?

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

If I can’t wash dishes to your album, it ain’t that fire.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

All arguments are solvable. The trick? Get naked.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

I ain’t typing “X” into the URL bar, my wife is right behind me.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has shared:

Trying to win an argument online is sociopathic. I would concede anything to get a stranger to leave me alone.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has bookmarked:

I used an air fryer for the first time tonight, and I feel like I just discovered fire.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

Marriage is between two people: one person who is on the verge of sleep and one person who is asking if the front door is locked.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

You don’t scare me. You’re not the evil eye I get from my dog when I make him get up from the couch so I can lay down.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Instagram:

I am just a man, a man who told a woman to calm down, so I guess this is goodbye.

Just landed via Threads:

Just saw onto the sidelines, they literally have enough footballs for all the players, they’re making them fight over that one for no reason.

Making waves on Discord:

Seeking a date so intense even the candles are sweating.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

I hate when teachers put “?” on my work, like I don’t know either.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Tomorrow isn’t promised, we need to flirt today.

Breaking via Snapchat:

I’ve faced more peer pressure to watch certain TV shows than to do drugs.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I don’t understand how spending more money than I earn is irresponsible. I’m giving more than I take. I’m generous.

Live now on Instagram:

Let’s lay on the couch together, play on our phones, and ignore each other, babe.

Just shared via YouTube:

“Slipping in the shower and trying to hold on to the water jet…” Shall I tell you more about myself?

Making waves on Telegram:

There aren’t enough hours in the day for me to do absolutely nothing.

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