Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

For this Halloween I’ve trained my eyebrows to leap off my face and destroy those who’ve angered me.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

It’s been too long since I partook in shenanigans.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

Why be just a part of the solution when you can be the whole problem?

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

Me: what can possibly go wrong though. Anxiety: I’m glad you asked.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has shared:

I can melt an ice cube just by staring at it. It takes a while, but I can do it.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

For my birthday, I want everyone to delete whatever old version of me they have in their head— it expired.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

I’m just here to make you wish I wasn’t.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

Together, I can beat schizophrenia.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has downloaded:

The global energy crisis could be solved if only we could harness the power of my wife slamming my car door.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has copied:

The neighbor sneezes loudly from the balcony. And because I’m a polite person, I shout loudly: Disgusting!