Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

I hate when I go to the kitchen looking for food, and all I find is ingredients.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

Somewhere there’s a girl ignoring 15 guys for a guy who gives her no attention.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

The worst person you know is studying psychology.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

Are we all getting a front-row seat to the end times, or what?

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

No LinkedIn, I am not “open to work,” I am required to work.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

You know who’s gonna love you in the end? Your dog.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

It scares me when you stay up late, like 3 a.m., and you hear a car go down the road, like, where are you going?

Someone from 🇹🇴 has bookmarked:

Getting the ick because he put the windshield wipers on at a higher rate than was needed.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

Not all people have bad neighbors. The ones next door have a great one.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

My husband was unable to find his coat earlier as he’d accidentally hung it up.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Jan 20, 2026

3,355

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Facebook:

I’ll never tell anyone your secret because that would mean talking to people.

Trending via Slack:

When they have a dream sequence in a movie, how do they film the person’s dream?

Seen just now on Threads:

I would love to be the reason you look at your phone and smile. Then walk into a wall.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

We are all monsters searching for someone to share our lives with.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

Sorry for bouncing my leg. I’m not allowed to bash my head into the walls anymore.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

So we have actual fact checkers who know all the facts? Why not create a TV channel where they just give us the facts? We could call it the News.

Going viral on Slack:

Millennials are so young because we were never allowed to grow up. Still living like broke college kids in our 40s.

Spotted on WeChat:

Who decided that “microwaves that beep forever” was a feature we needed.

Just shared via Telegram:

I’m liking your IG photo from 8 days ago because IG just showed me today!

Freshly posted on Facebook:

“Oh, I’d love to but I can’t.” Translation: I don’t want to so I won’t.

I feel like the person who named pink eye also named orange juice.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Haha, talk about a colorful imagination! 🌈👁️🍊 It's as if they were on a vibrant naming spree and decided to mix up eye conditions with breakfast beverages! Just imagine, "Excuse me, is that pink eye in your eye or just some orange juice residue?" 😂

comparison, eye, feel, funny comparison, humor, i, irony, juice, naming, orange, orange juice, person, pink, pink eye

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections

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Social Media Stars ⭐

33 shares on Snapchat this month:

I haven’t tried Yoga, but I bent over to pick up my keys off the floor, so I’m sure I wouldn’t like Yoga.

76 shares on Threads this month:

If you ever wanted to know anything about me, just get me a bottle of wine, and you will, in fact, find out in about 10 minutes.

86 shares on TikTok this month:

As someone who was born in August, I find the word leotard extremely offensive.

53 shares on Twitch this month:

Girls take a picture of their legs in a bubble bath and say “guess where I am”. The library?

90 shares on Reddit this month:

You cannot hurt me. You are not a hip-height table corner.

83 shares on Reddit this month:

Life isn’t funny, why should my posts be?

96 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Oh great, you brought your ancient ancestors with you.

72 shares on Twitch this month:

The agony of thinking you’re finished doing the dishes, only to turn around and, to your horror, the pot.

13 shares on Reddit this month:

Elections is like waiting for the results of a biopsy, except half your family hopes it’s cancer.

12 shares on Snapchat this month:

Not sure what’s longer: a microwave minute or watching a video while someone else is holding the phone, insisting it’s hilarious.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ll marry your mom just so I can ground you.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

They say the best things take time. That’s why I’m always late.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Has anyone noticed what it’s beginning to look a lot like?

18 folks are currently checking 👀

The human brain is amazing. It functions 24/7 from the day we’re born and only stops when you’re taking a test or speaking to someone attractive.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate small cars that disguise themselves as free parking spaces and drop their masks as soon as you pull up in front of them.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Unless you fell off the treadmill, no one wants to hear about your workout.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

At the dispensary asking which strain will stop the yearning.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

“Are you dating anyone?” I close my eyes when I walk past mirrors.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

The first step is admitting that the other person is the one with the problem.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

The only thing I miss from my past is that flat stomach I had.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,345

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

I’m not mad, I just hope your socks slide off in your shoe all day.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

I love cute tiny purses, but I’m sad to say I can never be a cute tiny purse girl. I need to haul my hoard of objects everywhere I go, because what if….

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

If you have a Roomba, but don’t dress it up in little outfits, then what are you even doing?

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

“Treat yourself. You deserve it,” she says while adding the shoes to her cart.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has viewed:

So single the neighborhood cats make ME dinner.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

Zen and the Art of Empty Pockets.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

My favorite part about health insurance is how your teeth and eyeballs are add-ons.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

Salted, and I cannot stress this enough, butter.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

Too poor for Ozempic but too undisciplined for strict diet and exercise. Is there a secret third option?

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

I didn’t really mind the voices in my head until one of them started their own podcast.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on YouTube:

Hey! Remember in the first grade when we were all just chilling and then some kid would throw up out of nowhere?

Just shared via Messenger:

Remind the demons under your bed that you’re the landlord, raise the rent.

Spotted on Twitch:

Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth. Then it becomes a soap opera.

Spotted on Discord:

In my retweeting era, because I’m just speechless.

Going viral on Threads:

Spotify Wrapped? Next year, maybe you should try to be in the top .05% of listeners to your girlfriend.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

The only thing that could heal me is a memory loss.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

It’s amazing how much I accomplish around the house right before someone is coming over.

Going viral on X:

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can’t get eight cats to pull a sled through snow.

Spotted on Discord:

Why read the room when you can leave the room?

Making waves on YouTube:

There should be 1 day a month without commercials.

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