Trendy Funny Quotes

  • I’m still trying to dig myself out my ringtone debt from the late 90’s.
  • Don’t you hate it when you buy veggies and when you get them home you realize they’re donuts?
  • They need to increase life expectancy so I can squeeze in another mid-life crisis.
  • Being Leonardo DiCaprio is like driving in a school zone. You don’t go above twenty-five.
  • My wife almost fell down the stairs today and that got us into a heated argument whether my gasp was out of concern or excitement.
  • What I lack in moves on the dance floor, I more than make up for in dancing around a conversation.