Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Tried to pull off a smokey eye, ended up looking like I went three rounds with McGregor.
  • An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but if the doctor is cute, forget the fruit.
  • Called in, ā€œIā€™m a time traveler. I came in today yesterday.ā€
  • Every Sunday is superbowel if you eat enough chili.
  • Dear autocorrect, that’s not what I was trying to say. I’m getting tired of your shirt.
  • Why would I spend money on the zoo when I can watch my colleagues for free?