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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇷 has shared:

If you have any questions or concerns please don’t. Hesitate to ask.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

It may sound crazy but some of us are nice without hidden agendas.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

I don’t miss calls, I stare at them.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

There is nothing worse in life than calling customer service and hearing an Indian accent.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

I told myself I’d behave today. Then I saw my reflection and thought, maybe tomorrow.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

9am: anything is possible. 2pm: maybe tomorrow.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

To save money in this economy, I’ve tried eating out and I’ve tried cooking at home. The answer is starvation.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

If Facebook has taught us anything it’s that a lot of people aren’t quite ready for a spelling bee.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

I’m at the age where using the wrong pillow makes you feel like you broke your neck.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

Long distance relationships can work if the four of you all truly trust each other.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2270 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,432

Funny Quotes Topics

15,133

Funny Quotes Images

12,432

2 hours ago

3,438

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Telegram:

What’s a beginner hobby for someone just getting into being happy?

Shared recently on Twitch:

Never skip the footnotes – it’s here you find out who made the author angry enough to write the article.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

We are gathered here today because our ancestors didn’t have condoms.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Girl math is avoiding shipping costs by buying more.

Going viral on Instagram:

TikTok? I still call it a watch.

Just shared via Reddit:

I like how my fridge also hums when it’s trying to concentrate.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I’m buysexual, you buy me food, I become sexual.

Going viral on Telegram:

Too many toilets have automatically flushed underneath me for me not to have reservations about self-driving cars.

Making waves on Telegram:

Geometry is a scam. What do you mean “prove it’s a triangle”? Just look at it.

Spotted on Slack:

Every app is a dating app if you are creepy enough.

I need to know the brand of toothbrush my neighbor has. I hear it buzzing sometimes an hour at a time and she’s clearly enjoying it.

Jan 22, 2025

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Sounds like your neighbor has upgraded from brushing her teeth to hosting a rave party in her mouth! 🦷🕺🎉 Maybe it's the latest high-tech toothbrush that also doubles as a DJ booth? 🎶😂 Just don't be surprised if you start hearing toothbrush remixes booming through the walls! 🎶🤣

brand, buzzing, care, curiosity, enjoying, funny observation, hear, hour, humor, i, know, need, neighbor, observation, personal, personal care, time, toothbrush

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2270 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,432

Funny Quotes Topics

15,133

Funny Quotes Images

12,432

2 hours ago

3,442

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

Nobody rots in bed like I do.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

Apparently, “I just don’t want to” is not a valid reason when your boss asks you why you’re not coming in today.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

Whoever came up with the name “dentures” really missed the opportunity to call them “substitooths”.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

I’m at the age where living in the woods and arguing with a raccoon sounds like a peaceful retirement plan.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

People tell introverts to talk more and get out of their comfort zone, but no one tells extroverts to shut up to make the zone comfortable.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

I had an irrational fear of bees until I saw My Girl and it became rational.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has shared:

I’m not even doomscrolling anymore, I’m just regular scrolling, and everything’s doomed.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has viewed:

Sorry for having no idea what the hell I am doing. It will happen again.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has viewed:

Every person you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Make it worse by asking if they’re drinking enough water.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

If a stranger starts talking to me in an elevator I say “I don’t want to talk in case we get stuck and I have to eat you” that usually shuts them up.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Messenger:

A Twitter swear jar could end world hunger.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Kids these days don’t know the shame of having to explain yo-yo injuries.

Just landed via Threads:

Can we take a moment to celebrate the little ride we get in the pneumatic chair at the hair salon or barber when they pump it up or down?

Going viral on Slack:

I’m not just a pretty face, I’m also a massive disappointment to my family.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

You sound smart. You some kinda ‘ologist?

Making waves on TikTok:

If you make it through life without being portrayed in a murder documentary, take the win.

Trending via Pinterest:

Why do plane tickets have to be so expensive? You’re literally going that way anyway. Just give me a ride.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Listen up. If he hooks his sunglasses in the front collar of his shirt, he’s got something important to say.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Don’t forget to overestimate your importance today.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Why can’t more dumb people be shy?

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