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Commentary:
"Ah, yes, the magical time when leftovers start developing autonomy 🍲🤖. They are probably having a party in your fridge while plotting their escape mission! Time to set them free, brave soul 😄👋."

away, food, humor, i, joke, leftover, old, think, throw, waste

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15 shares on Twitch this month:

January 1st always feels like a Sunday, regardless of what day it’s actually on.

80 shares on Messenger this month:

Have you ever wanted to grab somebody by the shoulders, give them a good shake and whisper “Nobody cares!”

33 shares on Reddit this month:

I think the Monday after Sunday should always be a day off.

72 shares on Snapchat this month:

Adulting is realizing you can’t skip work like you skipped class.

37 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Washing your face and water going down your elbow is so sickening.

43 shares on Pinterest this month:

Porn actresses envy the look on my face when I clean my ear with a cotton bud.

30 shares on Twitch this month:

Me every time I wake up: Oh no, not again!

15 shares on Pinterest this month:

Twitter is cigarette for the eyes.

15 shares on YouTube this month:

My life advice is always the same. Wait for karma, but take up kickboxing, just in case.

34 shares on Threads this month:

You didn’t get fired, your job “fumbled you”.

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Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

Life hack: You don’t need white noise to sleep when you have constant ringing in your ears.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

Pro tip: Avoid the news for a couple of days and have some fun.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

Why can’t Chinese restaurants chop the broccoli in their dishes? I feel like I’m trying to fit an entire bonsai tree into my mouth.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

December. A desperate celebration of an end.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

Halloween is the only day you can ghost someone and blame it on being festive.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

The best way to contact me is to meet me in my dreams at 3 a.m.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

RIP to everyone killed by the Gods for their hubris, but I’m different. And better. Maybe even better than the Gods.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

My default setting is sexual energy.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has shared:

Home is where you trust the toilet seat.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

As a retiree, I have two pairs of pajamas. Bedtime and daytime. Sometimes I get them confused.

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Going viral on YouTube:

Cinderella had one night out, and it changed her life. I had one night out, and it changed my credit score.

Trending via Pinterest:

I read that Miley Cyrus will be starring in a remake of Silence of the Lambs. She’ll be playing Hannibal Montannibal.

Making waves on Threads:

You should be able to like an email instead of replying to it.

Breaking via Messenger:

Unfortunately for the haters, I will continue to keep being me.

Trending via WeChat:

I secretly want you to say no when I offer you some of my cake.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I’ve never really had a beach body, but my snowman body is coming along quite nicely.

Making waves on Pinterest:

The 70s, 80s, and 90s were the best decades – so many memories, no evidence.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

If barking at nothing was an Olympic sport, my dog would win gold.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Hot girls have a private Instagram account with 20 followers.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Sorry, can’t make it, just remembered I don’t want to.

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I think my leftovers are old enough to throw themselves away.

My optimism doesn’t come out of thin air. A flask is involved.

Unfortunately, I don’t give ugly men a chance, because they wouldn’t give me one if I were the ugly one.

Accidentally used my real personality at work today… heading to HR now.

My favorite thing to do is nothing, with no one.

An alcoholic morning show host becoming Secretary of War is some Kurt Vonnegut shit.

You’re so vain. You probably think me being in this tree outside your house is about you.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I think my leftovers are old enough to throw themselves away.

Keep the laugh going 😂

My optimism doesn’t come out of thin air. A flask is involved.

Unfortunately, I don’t give ugly men a chance, because they wouldn’t give me one if I were the ugly one.

Accidentally used my real personality at work today… heading to HR now.

My favorite thing to do is nothing, with no one.

An alcoholic morning show host becoming Secretary of War is some Kurt Vonnegut shit.

You’re so vain. You probably think me being in this tree outside your house is about you.

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Trending Topics 📁

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