Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I’ll make you feel safe in that you’ll know you can outrun me if we are being chased by a murderer.
  • Being a dinosaur sounds kinda nice. No bills, no work, just extinct.
  • I need money, not feelings.
  • No matter how busy my Sunday gets, I always manage to set aside time to panic about Monday.
  • I think nervous flatulence would be helpful if you were ever kidnapped.
  • Taking my heart off my sleeve, I fold it up neatly and carefully place it back inside my chest.