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Commentary:
"When you show someone the year they can retire, it's like forcing them to gaze into the abyss of adulthood and mortality 😱💸💼 Retirement age: the scariest bedtime story ever told!"

check, cry, goal, humor, just, life, life goal, reality, reality check, retirement, sad, sad truth, show, someone, truth, year

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

In university, you are either struggling academically, financially, emotionally, or all three.

0

6 days ago

academic, emotional, emotionally, financial, life, struggle, student, student life, three, university
Scrolling… good take… bad take… nothing take… cyberbullying… beautiful woman.

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2 months ago

bad, beautiful, cyberbullying, digital, digital life, good, humor, interaction, life, media, nothing, online, online interaction, scrolling, self-esteem, social, social media, take, woman
Sorry for what I said when I was drunk. I meant every word.

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2 months ago

apology, confession, context, drunk, every, honesty, humor, i, meant, relationship, sorry, word, words
Ending my thesis paper with “but who cares what I think?”

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2 months ago

academic, ending, humor, i, opinion, paper, procrastination, sarcasm, thesis, think, writing
We’ve been talking about eating the rich for so long, they got over-ripe.

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2 months ago

commentary, eating, got, humor, metaphor, overripe, rich, social, social commentary, talking
Been there, done that. Then, been there several more times, because apparently I never learn.

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2 months ago

experience, fun, humor, i, irony, learn, learning, life, mistakes, repetition, times

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

46 shares on X this month:

The most embarrassing thing in the world is when you make a fool of yourself in front of a baby and it doesn’t laugh.

68 shares on Slack this month:

They say every snowflake is different, as if someone actually checked them.

30 shares on Slack this month:

Thank God they have medical marijuana in this state. I need it for my joints.

76 shares on Threads this month:

Some people are like “I’m a people pleaser,” and not a single person is pleased with them.

17 shares on Facebook this month:

Some days you’re the quick brown fox and other days you’re the lazy dog.

84 shares on Twitch this month:

Just blocked all the ugly people, so if you see this… what’s up, big sexy?

64 shares on Telegram this month:

People ask you, “are you crazy”, and then get scared when you answer, “yes”.

47 shares on Twitch this month:

In terms of wasting time, today was very productive.

76 shares on Instagram this month:

Life hack: Allow yourself 8–12 hours of alone time every morning to prepare for the day.

76 shares on Facebook this month:

Me (seductively looking at a potato): would mash.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

The whole “read before you go to bed to get sleepy” thing does not apply to me because I will be up till 5 a.m. if the book is worth it.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

When people suck the life out of you, they should take some fat too.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

Dating apps? No thanks, if I wanted to talk to someone for hours and accomplish nothing, I’d contact tech support.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

Finally my winter fat has gone. I now have spring rolls.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

God ate when he created sleep, what a beautiful concept.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

Arkansas is just Kansas for pirates.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

Sorry for zoning out, bro. It’s just, I’ve been having a bad day for several years.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

If you see me online, I’m not chatting. I’m busy ignoring the world and laughing at memes like it’s therapy.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

My back and I are definitely not the same age.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has viewed:

If you want to feel really bad about yourself, just start dating.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via TikTok:

How did they call Deadpool’s dog ‘Dogpool’ when ‘Deadpoodle’ was right there?

Shared recently on Threads:

When someone is in a Christmas eve panic, I always find that “well, maybe you should have thought of that sooner” is a helpful phrase.

Trending via Pinterest:

The PhD student is someone who foregoes their current happiness in order to forego future happiness.

Just landed via Slack:

When the Olympics finally introduces the event “Dropping your phone and very nearly catching it but not quite” then you’ll all see me shine.

Spotted on TikTok:

If you’re just talking nonsense all the time and not thinking about what you’re doing, you’re either in love or at the office.

Going bananas on Facebook:

Sleep well, middle finger—you’ve got a big day ahead of you tomorrow.

Just shared via Messenger:

Your favorite little ball of silliness has logged in.

Spotted on Telegram:

People say opposites attract, but I say find a partner who’s deranged in the same ways you are and double your capacity to be annoying.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Women love it when you approach them on the street and say “whoa, is there a hot babe convention in town?”

Just landed via LinkedIn:

You’d think, with the amount of overthinking I do, I’d make the right decision.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

If you wanna make someone cry, just show them the earliest year they can retire.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

In university, you are either struggling academically, financially, emotionally, or all three.

Scrolling… good take… bad take… nothing take… cyberbullying… beautiful woman.

Sorry for what I said when I was drunk. I meant every word.

Ending my thesis paper with “but who cares what I think?”

We’ve been talking about eating the rich for so long, they got over-ripe.

Been there, done that. Then, been there several more times, because apparently I never learn.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨