Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Don’t tell me about Stockholm Syndrome, I woke up at 6 AM on my first day of vacation wondering how things were going at work.
  • Yes, I sometimes put my cell phone down. Especially when it rings.
  • My superpower? I can look you right in the eyes while you’re talking and not hear a single word you said.
  • I’m sick of getting woken up at 6am by the bin men. I just want a nice sleep but they always insist that I get out of the bin before they collect it.
  • I just finally discovered what’s wrong with my brain: on the left side there is nothing right and on the right side, there is nothing left.
  • I’m actually pretty attractive, if you don’t compare me to anyone, ever.