I’m not being mean. I’m just too old to pretend to like you.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

Ask your doctor if it’s right for you to eat oranges and pretend they’re planets and you’re a Greek god.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

Summer is the best because there’s always a chance I’ll see someone trip on their own flip flop.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

Growing up, I didn’t think the expensive addiction that would ruin me would be Heinz ketchup, but here we are.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

Why is it called the Super Bowl if no one is bowling?

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

People who don’t have a dishwasher, where do they bang their shins?

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

Don’t forget to whine and complain about Monday today.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

Venting to ChatGPT is crazy, y’all turning schizophrenic.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

So apparently if they ask “do you trust me?”, replying with “well, I trust you to be you” is the incorrect response.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

Hell hath no fury like a sports bra being applied to a just showered but not 100% dry body.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has downloaded:

I’ve just told my doctor I have all the Monkey Pox symptoms. He asked me to swing by tomorrow.