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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

Mrs. Doubtfire is my favorite movie about violating a custody agreement.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

Welcome to your parents’ house, where the wifi password is fEtbqP2LVp3U6Hkh

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

You know when you have so much to do that you just sit down and do nothing?

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

Insomniacs who are not afraid of the dark have nighty-night problems but the pitch ain’t one.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

Due to personal reasons, I’ve decided to become your problem.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

Woke up and immediately broke my resolution to be less sexy this year.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to cancel plans.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

Am I just getting older, or are people getting more annoying?

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

Back to work at last! I couldn’t sleep for sheer anticipation.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

Apparently the thirstiest creature in the whole world is always a kid who’s been told to go back to his bed like a hundred times.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2006 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,168

Funny Quotes Topics

14,929

Funny Quotes Images

12,168

41 seconds ago

3,432

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via YouTube:

Apologize for the job that you do. It would be nice if you were talented too.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I have entirely too many new bruises for someone who isn’t getting laid.

Just landed via Messenger:

If Keith Richards survived the ’70s, the ’80s, and 1.2 million Marlboros, I can probably survive anything.

Making waves on Twitch:

My ex texted me saying, “Hey, I miss you,” so I replied, “Sorry, I have zero bars — the past doesn’t have good reception.”

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

“Turn down for what?” My ears, fella. My ears.

Just landed via Instagram:

Please remember, I am an inspiration for birth control.

Going viral on Instagram:

Caveman: I just invented the wheel. Journalist: Here’s why the wheel is bad for humanity.

Spotted on Threads:

Why the hell is it called the restroom? I am fighting for my life in here.

Going viral on Facebook:

The most refreshing way to fight your personal demons is to make demonade.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Thinking of starting a club for people who don’t like to leave their house. There are no meetings.

It’s so funny when someone writes a song to try to get someone to have sex with them. That’s what a bird would do!

4 months ago

It’s so funny when someone writes a song to try to get someone to have sex with them. That’s what a bird would do!

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Commentary:
"Apparently, birds have been mastering the art of seduction long before humans – who knew their chirping was just a clever ploy all along! Now I’m imagining a bird composing a catchy tune with lyrics like, 'Wanna perch on my branch tonight? Tweet me back, baby!' Ah, the avian version of a love song – nature truly is full of surprises!"

bird, creativity, flirting, humor, nature, relationship, sex, someone, song

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2006 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,168

Funny Quotes Topics

14,929

Funny Quotes Images

12,168

41 seconds ago

3,438

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

Super excited about a brand new day of ignoring my problems.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has copied:

Having to pee when you’re driving is problematic. Having to sneeze when you’re driving is even more problematic.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

No one talks about how uncomfortable it is to ask for your own money back.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has shared:

That sound when you close the cupboard and hear something fall inside, that’s the sound of somebody else’s problem.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has downloaded:

Not to brag but I don’t even need alcohol to make really bad decisions.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

I have 206 bones, 650 muscles and 50 billion cells in my body. It takes time to wake up all of them up in the morning.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

I think that police officers on foot should wear blue flashing sneakers.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has copied:

My reality check bounced, guess I’ll have to stay insane for the time being.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

“People you may know” and it’s someone I would set on fire.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

Grammar is important. It’s the difference between feeling your nuts and feeling you’re nuts.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on X:

Welcome to social media. A person who does not understand humor will contact you shortly.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Now that the nights are getting cooler again, spiders often hide in your bed in search of warmth. Sleep well!

Just shared via TikTok:

My phone and it’s charger are in a situationship and sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Stick with me and you’ll go places. None of them good, but still.

Making waves on Telegram:

They should invent a way to delete other people’s posts.

Making waves on Threads:

Everyone has their talents. Mine is picking the checkout line filled with people who apparently have never gone through a checkout line before in their life.

Live now on Snapchat:

I feel like an adult spelling bee would humble a lot of us.

Trending via Messenger:

If they stole your post, they probably need it more than you do.

Making waves on Pinterest:

What base is it when you’re flirting with a woman, and she asks, “Are you all right”?

Going viral on Reddit:

Wanna worship each other until the end of all things?

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