Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • For my birthday, I want everyone to tell me how much they love me and why in immense detail.
  • Love when a doctor emails me about my “outstanding bill”. If it’s so good, why don’t you pay it?
  • My lotion bottle says to use it on areas of irritation, so I slathered it all over my coworker, Deborah.
  • They say every snowflake is different, as if someone actually checked them.
  • Netflix subtitles be like “speaking foreign language”. Bro, translate it!
  • Girls will be like “it’s fine” and then go and curse your whole bloodline.