Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Reminder: Trust in a man's promise to fix things is directly proportional to his memory… or so the legends say. 🤷‍♂️🔧 #FixItForgetIt"

commitment, fix, humor, lady, man, need, procrastination, relationship, reminder

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

If you don’t know how many x-rays it takes before a person develops super powers, should you really be in a medical profession?

3 months ago

humor, irony, know, knowledge, medical, medical profession, person, power, profession, super, super power, x-ray
My fantasy is having two men at once. One cooking, one cleaning.

4 months ago

chores, cleaning, cooking, fantasy, having, humor, man, men, once, relationship, wish
While a leaf blower is a close second, my preferred cleaner is a flamethrower.

3 months ago

absurdity, blower, cleaner, cleaning, close, exaggeration, flamethrower, humor, leaf, leaf blower, second, tools, unconventional, unconventional tools
As president, I will allow people to use the same password as before when changing their password.

2 months ago

before, change, changing, humor, i, irony, password, people, politics, president, same, security
I read somewhere on the internet that 87% of what you read on the internet isn’t true, and I believe it.

2 months ago

believe, humor, i, internet, misinformation, online, read, sarcasm, skepticism, somewhere, true, truth
Just so you know, it’s almost impossible to drink coffee while laying down.

2 months ago

challenge, coffee, drink, humor, impossible, just, know, laying, laying down

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

72 shares on YouTube this month:

At my size, I’d be called Buffet the Vampire Slayer.

73 shares on X this month:

Humans should grow a new set of teeth in our 30s to make-up for all the poor decisions in our 20s.

65 shares on Messenger this month:

What many call beauty can just be wiped off 90% of the time.

48 shares on LinkedIn this month:

If Monday were available for purchase at IKEA, it would be called “Fekking Hell”.

59 shares on TikTok this month:

Holding it together with duct tape and sarcasm.

86 shares on Facebook this month:

“Jump to Recipe” is the closest we’ll ever get to teleportation.

12 shares on Snapchat this month:

Her idea of a romantic setting is one that has a diamond in it.

69 shares on Snapchat this month:

Real introverts are too introverted to tell people they’re introverts.

94 shares on YouTube this month:

Bears and worms have almost nothing in common. But gummy bears and gummy worms? Very similar.

66 shares on Discord this month:

Abandoned amusement parks are so creepy. It’s no wonder they were abandoned.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

Uber Eats “you forgot to finish your order” notification is funny because I didn’t forget, I just came to my senses.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

Name a better duo than sad and depressed.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

A fun thing to do on a first date is wear a wedding dress.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has viewed:

The enemy of my enemy is my friend. But I’m my own worst enemy, so I guess I’m also my best friend.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

I had an irrational fear of bees until I saw My Girl and it became rational.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

Being a dog must be wild, everyone you meet is your masseuse.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

My Saturday was going really well, until I realized it’s Sunday!

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

Some say the world will end in fire. Others say in ice. Coming up next, our expert panel breaks down the arguments for each side…

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

Why are there people outside at the same time as me? It’s my turn.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

I composed this post in a way that only the sexy can read it, so congratulations.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on X:

Alcohol and eye contact is a deadly combo.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

So we have actual fact checkers who know all the facts? Why not create a TV channel where they just give us the facts? We could call it the News.

Seen just now on Reddit:

My lotion bottle says to use it on areas of irritation, so I slathered it all over my coworker, Deborah.

Spotted on Discord:

If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?

Just landed via Snapchat:

Born to be a Jedi spinning a lightsaber, forced to work full-time and pay rent.

Spotted on Messenger:

My spirit animal is a sloth on its fourth nap of the day!

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Just read the Ten Commandments for the first time and you can’t do shit with your neighbor.

Making waves on Messenger:

Sharks are orcs, dolphins are elves.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

The masculine urge to make a woman sit through a YouTube video that she will not find funny or entertaining.

Making waves on Slack:

My outfit is from Gucci and the body from Ferrero.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Ladies, if a man says he will fix something, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months about it.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

If you don’t know how many x-rays it takes before a person develops super powers, should you really be in a medical profession?

My fantasy is having two men at once. One cooking, one cleaning.

While a leaf blower is a close second, my preferred cleaner is a flamethrower.

As president, I will allow people to use the same password as before when changing their password.

I read somewhere on the internet that 87% of what you read on the internet isn’t true, and I believe it.

Just so you know, it’s almost impossible to drink coffee while laying down.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨