Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • My only knowledge of animals is that turtles like pizza and cats like lasagna.
  • I can’t wait til I have hearing aids, so I can just turn them off when I’m tired of hearing everyone.
  • No, I mean, it’s great toast. I just didn’t expect it to be French.
  • I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.
  • We’d never met, or even spoken, but I could tell just from gazing into her pale blue eyes I had stepped on her toe.
  • I tried to scream into the abyss today but got a busy signal.