Wordgag ใƒ„

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ญ๐Ÿ‡ท has viewed:

Imagine you get to the gates of heaven and they make you download an app to go in.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡ฆ has copied:

They should invent a customer service center that isn’t “currently experiencing higher than normal call volume”.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ช๐Ÿ‡ธ has bookmarked:

I stopped experimenting in bed after the great honey disaster of 2015.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ฆ has viewed:

I suck at flirting. I be like “is that so?”

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ง has bookmarked:

Have you ever met someone and thought that you couldnโ€™t wait to spend the rest of your life without them?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ญ has bookmarked:

Interviewer: “What did you learn from your previous job?” Me: “That I need a new job.”

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ฌ has copied:

Today I broke my personal record for most consecutive days lived.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡ฆ has downloaded:

IKEA assembly instructions should come with a glossary of Swedish swear words.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ฌ has viewed:

You want me to turn around? The thing that led to a total eclipse of the heart.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡ฆ has bookmarked:

I wish I could put an AirTag on my sanity.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

789 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,951

Funny Quotes Topics

13,923

Funny Quotes Images

10,951

Updated

28 minutes ago

Users Online

3,438

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Just shared via Instagram:

Spilling hot coffee on your lap wakes you up faster than drinking it.

Just landed via X:

Iโ€™ve officially reached the age where I donโ€™t want to do anything after 9pm.

Reported on Snapchat:

You ran a half marathon? Thatโ€™s really cool, Iโ€™ve almost finished a bunch of things, too.

Making waves on Snapchat:

The first people who called chocolate a vegetable are the real heroes.

Shared recently on Instagram:

My workout is reading in bed until my arms hurt.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Just a friendly reminder folks. Donโ€™t forget to set back your rooster this weekend.

Just landed via Twitch:

Donโ€™t play with the feelings I barely have.

Making waves on YouTube:

My save-for-later cart on Amazon is up to about $1.5 million dollars.

Freshly posted on Slack:

So you mean to tell me a stress ball is not for throwing at people who stress you out?

Making waves on Slack:

Making eye contact with strangers on the sidewalk and saying “it’s crazy that they just let me walk around, haha”.

“Left alone” would have been the right answer as a child to the question of what I wanted to be when I grew up.

“Left alone” would have been the right answer as a child to the question of what I wanted to be when I grew up.
Download image โ†“

Commentary:
If only childhood dreams came with a disclaimer of needing introvert-friendly career options! ๐Ÿ™…โ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ˜‚ Looks like "left alone" is the ultimate career aspiration for all the lone wolves out there! ๐Ÿบ #DreamJobGoals

, , , , , , , , , , , ,

Related Funny Quotes ๐Ÿค

Trending Funny Quotes ๐Ÿ‘‡

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! ๐Ÿ˜‰โœŒ๏ธ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’ฅ

Trending Funny Quotes ๐Ÿ“ˆ

Hot Funny Quotes ๐Ÿ”ฅ

Trending Topics ๐Ÿ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

789 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,951

Funny Quotes Topics

13,923

Funny Quotes Images

10,951

Updated

28 minutes ago

Users Online

3,433

Funny Quotes of the Month ๐Ÿš€

Funny Quotes of the Year โญ

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ท has downloaded:

My last straw is way longer than I thought.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has shared:

Helpful police officer reminded me he’s the one asking the questions.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ฉ has copied:

If my coworker doesnโ€™t stop asking questions on this Zoom meeting, I will drive across town and slap his face on the call.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡พ has shared:

These aliens are taking forever.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ด๐Ÿ‡ฒ has bookmarked:

My favorite part of socializing is when it’s over.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ซ๐Ÿ‡ฎ has viewed:

Ironically, the Internet was invented to save time.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ช๐Ÿ‡ช has shared:

Apparently “Spite” is not an appropriate answer to “What motivates you?”

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡พ๐Ÿ‡ช has bookmarked:

When I get tired of shopping, I sit down and try on shoes.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ท๐Ÿ‡ด has shared:

I’ve spent 80% of my adult life resetting my password.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฉ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has shared:

Iโ€™m gonna start sending women unsolicited pizza pics.

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Trending via Twitch:

I probably think this song is about me.

Spotted on Slack:

Me summer vacation planning: Iโ€™m going to Europe. Bank account: Youโ€™re going camping.

Just shared via X:

Life is short, unless youโ€™re listening to a kid describing an episode of PAW Patrol.

Spotted on Slack:

Sometimes the laugh is funnier than the joke itself.

Broadcasted on X:

Have kids so you can live in a house full of people who canโ€™t find anything.

Going viral on Messenger:

Hate when other parents at school drop off act like theyโ€™re better than me just because they remembered to bring all of their children.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Your 20s are for lusting after furniture you can’t afford actually.

Just landed via Discord:

Every year, just in time for Christmas, when it’s freezing cold, the Coca Cola truck shows up. Now, in this freaking heat, it’s nowhere to be seen.

Trending via TikTok:

Keep smiling, it makes people wonder what you’re up to.

Going viral on Twitch:

Do you ever think about how many people squeezed the avocado that youโ€™re eating?

Share Wordgag ๐Ÿ™

ยฉ 2025. All fights retarded. ๐Ÿคช

Made with โค๏ธ in Sydney โ˜€๏ธ๐ŸŒด