Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Sorry for the things I said when I thought you weren’t listening.
  • I heard you like bad girls. Well, I’m bad. At everything.
  • Guys love being called “daddy” until the pregnancy test comes back positive.
  • Mom asked me what I was drinking the first time I got drunk and I said “breast milk” and now she’s not talking to me.
  • Aliens are gonna be super confused when they show up threatening to overthrow our leaders and we’re all stoked and offer to help.
  • Got me some lemons now for the cold. I hope the tequila helps.