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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

I got 99 problems and money could solve at least 69 of them.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

Being strange is exhausting.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has downloaded:

I miss you (the money I spent).

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

I wish I could have a kid just to see what it looks like… and then put it back.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

A haunted house, but every room is just learning more about Will & Jada.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

I feel like waking up early on the weekend is so disrespectful.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

If you make it through life without being portrayed in a murder documentary, take the win.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

I’m that person who will restart a song because I got distracted and wasn’t appreciating it enough.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

I wish I could put an AirTag on my sanity.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

A hot tub is basically a big bowl of human soup.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

522 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,115

Funny Quotes Topics

17,265

Funny Quotes Images

15,115

Updated

Dec 25, 2025

Users Online

4,070

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Snapchat:

I’ve taken a long, hard look at myself. I won’t be doing that again.

Just shared via Snapchat:

My favorite thing to do when I see people I know in public is to pretend I didn’t.

Just shared via Slack:

Other people: You should get out of your comfort zone. Me: You should get out of my comfort zone.

Going viral on Telegram:

Have you ever been in the car with someone who drives like we got extra lives?

Spotted on Reddit:

Odd people reviewing a dessert: It’s not too sweet which is what I like.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Sometimes I think the subway rat is doing better than me. He has a routine, a social circle, and knows where to find the best pizza.

Making waves on Discord:

Drive as I say, not as I drive.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I miss the way I viewed the world before I found out too much about it.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

“I’m at that stage of Christmas shopping where I start buying myself presents.”

Spotted on YouTube:

Introverts have fun, too — we just don’t care if you know.

Microdosing bungee jumping by bending over to pick up a hair tie.

0
Microdosing bungee jumping by bending over to pick up a hair tie.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
Oh, the thrill of extreme activities in everyday life! 💇‍♀️ Who knew picking up a hair tie could be the new adrenaline rush trend? Just remember to stretch and warm up those bending-over muscles for the ultimate microdosage of excitement! 🤸‍♂️ #HairTieBungeeJumping

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

65 shares on Twitch this month:

If I had The Force, I’d just use it to open pistachios.

63 shares on X this month:

I’m glad laughter is the best medicine because my insurance sucks.

37 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If my calculator had a history, it would be more embarrassing than my browser history.

76 shares on Messenger this month:

The Recipe for Disaster in me, recognizes the Appetite for Destruction in you.

52 shares on Telegram this month:

Imagine hating me, and I’m not even paying attention.

40 shares on Snapchat this month:

When I’m behind a slow car, I steer my car a little to the right so the people behind me can see that it isn’t my fault.

25 shares on WeChat this month:

“Are you seeing anyone,” like hallucinating?

11 shares on YouTube this month:

Once again, I have fallen for life’s biggest scam: being two hours early for a flight only for security to take roughly seven minutes.

63 shares on Instagram this month:

I could have done without braces back then. What’s the point of having perfect teeth if I have no reason to smile?

28 shares on Messenger this month:

Sleep with each other, or someone else will!

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m sorry I roasted you, I was trying to flirt.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

You wish you had this many chins.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Not only do I turn down my radio to find a house or a parking spot, but I also take off my sunglasses to hear someone better.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I didn’t believe in karma until I was scheduled to work at 6am on a holiday.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I wonder how much this “Never mind, it’s only 10 bucks” has already cost me?

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I miss getting my misinformation from less places.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Somebody needs to get my shit together.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

“Mom, how did we get so rich?” your father said, “Thanks, nothing from my end,” on thousands of important Zoom meetings.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t always cook dinner but when I do, I use every pan in the kitchen.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Controlling your anger at work is a job in itself.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

522 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,115

Funny Quotes Topics

17,265

Funny Quotes Images

15,115

Updated

Dec 25, 2025

Users Online

3,598

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇹 has viewed:

Date night idea: fight another couple.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

“You’re an adult, maybe it’s time to stop fighting with people on the internet.”

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

There’s a word in modern Hungarian slang, egérmozi, which describes watching films (or shows) on your phone. It means “mouse cinema”.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

They should make a movie that’s good the whole way through.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

Every time I blink, it’s Monday again. I can’t live like this.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

At this point, I’m rooting for the aliens.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

If I meet you at a party and you instantly start asking about my job, you are subhuman to me.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

Another day without sex, but a mosquito just sucked on my neck and I moaned a little bit.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

Once I find a dragon, y’all are toast.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

Welcome to your 40’s: you have big plans tonight. No, you don’t.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via X:

Google Maps should not count towards my screen time. I’m not addicted to my phone, I’m disoriented.

Seen just now on Reddit:

We just accepted air fryers and never once questioned how air fries things.

Just landed via YouTube:

Gravity called. It’s sick of holding me up.

Live now on Facebook:

Books are so cool because there are no bloody ads in them.

Making waves on Facebook:

I can’t really explain it but cereal at night tastes better than cereal in the morning.

Spotted on Telegram:

You don’t do laundry once a week. You do it constantly, endlessly, forever—until you die.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Isn’t it beautiful how ‘Bruh’ has stood the test of time all these years.

Spreading quickly via X:

He had the nerve to call me pretty. I’m gorgeous.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

If you need ChatGPT to write an email, maybe you shouldn’t have job.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Every time I have to repeat myself, a new curse word gets added into the sentence.

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