Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Looks like we've got a covert operation on our hands – Operation: Heart Eyes! 🕵️‍♂️💌 Keep your enemies close and your co-workers closer, especially the hearts-for-eyes types! 😂💔 #SpyGames"

ask, eyes, heart, heart eyes, humor, i, jealousy, missionary, relationship, texting, trust, work

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33 shares on Telegram this month:

Shaking my head like an Etch a Sketch to get my thoughts right.

83 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’m at the gym and I just saw someone put their water bottle in the Pringles holder on the treadmill.

97 shares on Twitch this month:

(Flirting) What’s every single thing you’ve ever thought?

70 shares on Messenger this month:

If you ever get a chance to date a cute person for one day, where will you take me?

26 shares on Twitch this month:

I automatically assume everyone finds me unattractive until they tell me otherwise, and then I assume that they are lying to make fun of me.

93 shares on Threads this month:

You know what brought my home value up? Not having an angry man in it.

41 shares on Slack this month:

The agony of thinking you’re finished doing the dishes, only to turn around and, to your horror, the pot.

75 shares on Telegram this month:

My friends have canceled our dinner plans two nights in a row. I’m starting to think they don’t like dinner.

66 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The one thing to know about me is I always get the last laugh. And oh yes, it’s maniacal.

96 shares on Slack this month:

Kids be like, I see you have a moment to yourself, and I must correct that immediately.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

If you have a pure heart, you can make pretty much any non-baking meal off just vibes and intuition.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

Ever since I learned the show is called Suits because of lawsuits and not because they wear suits, I have harbored a hot white rage within me beyond anything mankind has ever known.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

So far, no one has seriously tried to bribe me, which is a shame because I am extremely corrupt. Maybe I need a position with more power.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has viewed:

I never sit around waiting for anyone except for the pizza delivery guy.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

The biggest problem with finding another job is I don’t want one.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has downloaded:

“Quit” is not in my vocabulary but “resign”, “drop out”, and “give up” are.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

When people talk about enriching their lives, I assume they’ve found a way to add more cheese.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has copied:

I come from a family of failed magicians. I have two half sisters.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

Today I was in a taxi, and the taxi driver said, “I love my job. I am my own boss, nobody tells me what to do!” Then I said, “Turn left.”

Someone from 🇹🇷 has copied:

I believe in you. I also believe in Bigfoot so don’t get too excited.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Zombies only eat brains, so you are safe.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

A two-year old is kind of like having a blender, but you don’t have a top for it.

Just shared via X:

This too shall pass. It might pass like a kidney stone. But it will pass.

Just shared via Instagram:

Smoking will kill you. Bacon will kill you. Ironically, smoking bacon will cure it.

Going viral on Slack:

A haunted house, but it’s just you inside your own head.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Slim Shady implies the existence of Thicc Sunny.

Shared recently on TikTok:

How soon into a new relationship should you let her know you’re an idiot?

Freshly posted on Instagram:

“I’ll worry about it next time.” Me pissing off future me.

Seen just now on Reddit:

I’d stalk me too, I get it.

Making waves on YouTube:

Our neighbor complained that our cat is always running through his garden. My father said: “Okay, I’ll tell her.”

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Missionary, so I can look him in the eyes and ask him why Ashley from work is texting him with heart eyes.

Using ChatGPT requires you to actually be smart; otherwise, it just regurgitates your dumb takes back to you.

If the universe is continuing to expand then why does my rent keep going up?

Interrupt my sleep and I’ll interrupt your breathing.

Long distance relationships can work if the four of you all truly trust each other.

I think it broke my boyfriend’s heart when I said he couldn’t have Salma Hayek for Valentine’s Day.

Karma not moving fast enough for me. I would hate to handle it myself, Lord.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Missionary, so I can look him in the eyes and ask him why Ashley from work is texting him with heart eyes.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Using ChatGPT requires you to actually be smart; otherwise, it just regurgitates your dumb takes back to you.

If the universe is continuing to expand then why does my rent keep going up?

Interrupt my sleep and I’ll interrupt your breathing.

Long distance relationships can work if the four of you all truly trust each other.

I think it broke my boyfriend’s heart when I said he couldn’t have Salma Hayek for Valentine’s Day.

Karma not moving fast enough for me. I would hate to handle it myself, Lord.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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