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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

The first 7 days of the week aren’t for me.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

Back then, my parents were afraid of what I would do on the Internet. Today, I’m afraid of what my parents do on the Internet.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

Not to brag but there are so many movies out there that have watched me sleep.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

Twitter can teach you a lot of lessons. Grammar is not one of them.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

Adults are always asking children what they want to be when they grow up because they’re looking for ideas.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

If you’re not in my circle of trust, you’re probably in my triangle of suspicion or rhombus of doubt.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

In my defense, I was left alone unsupervised.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

I’m like 2% cute and 98% ugly.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

You can’t spell fries without friends. I guess what I’m saying is that fries are friends. Delicious friends.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

If politicians can text my cell phone asking for money, I should be able to text them directly with policy suggestions.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

763 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,925

Funny Quotes Topics

13,894

Funny Quotes Images

10,925

60 minutes ago

3,432

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on Pinterest:

The difference between coffee and your opinion is that I asked for coffee.

Reported on Discord:

Taking a dog named shark to the beach is a bad idea.

Just landed via Instagram:

It’s almost time to pack away the black summer clothes and unpack the black winter clothes.

Seen just now on Threads:

Work is the worst video game ever.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Another Netflix price increase? Guess we’re only chilling now.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

If I were a category, I’d be “miscellaneous.”

Spotted on Snapchat:

I’m basically the human version of tangled up Christmas lights.

Spotted on Instagram:

Non-parents be like: I would simply instruct the toddler to do something he doesn’t want to do, and he would obey.

Trending via LinkedIn:

My wife almost fell down the stairs today and that got us into a heated argument whether my gasp was out of concern or excitement.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Stop blaming yourself for your failures. Learn astrology and blame the planets.

Probably the worst thing about the death of print media is the devastating effect it’s having on the producers of traditional ransom notes.

6 months ago

Probably the worst thing about the death of print media is the devastating effect it’s having on the producers of traditional ransom notes.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Well, it looks like even criminals are feeling the heat from the digital age! 📰💻 Imagine the struggle of trying to cut and paste your handwritten demands when everyone is switching to text messages and emails. Looks like ransom notes are going virtual too! #OldSchoolCrimeGoneDigital 🕵️‍♂️💻

communication, death, devastating, effect, having, humor, irony, media, note, notes, print, print media, producers, ransom, ransom note, satire, thing, traditional, traditional media, worst

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

763 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,925

Funny Quotes Topics

13,894

Funny Quotes Images

10,925

60 minutes ago

3,440

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

Intermittent fasting is how I drive, not how I eat.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

“Thanks for your payment!” Shut up. I paid that bill against my will.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

There should be a socially acceptable way to say, “I’m not sure what to say to that. Can you please say something different?”.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

My husband accidentally locked himself out of the house, and I didn’t hear him knocking until I finished eating the rest of his cheesecake. So weird.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

‘I have a ripe avocado at home’ is my favorite excuse for cancelling plans.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

Be so funny that everyone forgets that you are ugly!

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

Prophecy class has been cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has bookmarked:

Getting mad when an app updates and changes their format is the new “rearranged grocery store” for me.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

The sun is so successful because it has the perfect bedtime and morning routines.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

People would be more motivated to lose weight if the weight they lost went on to someone they didn’t like.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Twitch:

Y’all smell that? A beautiful day that the Lord has made.

Broadcasted on X:

I feel like an adult spelling bee would humble a lot of us.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I suck at flirting. I be like “is that so?”

Just landed via Threads:

I don’t mean to say that I drink a lot of coffee, but Colombian farmers have a photo of me in their wallets.

Live now on X:

Any time I have ever uttered the phrase “no worries” I have been lying. There are many worries.

Live now on Discord:

When I was a kid, I never expected the future to suck this much.

Making waves on Telegram:

Gonna spend today following my cats into the kitchen and meowing at them until they give me treats.

Shared recently on Facebook:

8 pm to 10 pm on a weeknight is the shortest that two hours can possibly be.

Shared recently on Instagram:

There’s no filter on my pics or my thoughts. I’m just out here raw-dogging it.

Just shared via Twitch:

Apparently, it’s rude to poke someone in the forehead and yell “Skip Intro” when they start talking to you.

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