Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
Looks like yesterday's bad mood has upgraded to a full-blown vacation package! 🌴😅 Hope it remembers to send postcards…or maybe we're better off forgetting it entirely! 📵 #MoodTravelGoals

bad, bad mood, baggage, feelings, humor, mood, multi-day, tour, travel, yesterday

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Are you just gonna go with the flow until you spiral down the drain?

0

2 months ago

choices, consequences, drain, flow, humor, just, life, spiral
Adding “Free HBO” to your dating profile isn’t the game changer you’d think it’d be.

0

2 months ago

attempt, dating, dating profile, entertainment, free, game, humor, humor attempt, joke, media, profile, social, social media, think
I just want what every middle-aged person wants: to remember what it was that I wanted.

0

2 months ago

every, existential, goals, humor, i, identity, just, life, life goals, middle-aged, nostalgia, person, remember, want, wanted
At the self-checkout, I make small talk with myself and I wish I would just shut up.

0

2 months ago

anxiety, awkward, awkward moment, conversation, humor, i, introvert, just, moment, myself, self-checkout, shopping, shut, small, small talk, social, social anxiety, talk, wish
In the autumn there are two types of creatures who collect acorns: squirrels and toddlers.

0

2 months ago

acorn, acorns, autumn, collection, creature, creatures, humor, nature, playfulness, squirrel, squirrels, toddler, types
Pursuing an academic career is like thinking the stripper loves you.

0

1 month ago

academic, academic career, career, comparison, humor, love, pursuit, stripper, thinking

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

48 shares on Slack this month:

The sound of rain outside when you’re in bed is elite.

25 shares on Instagram this month:

Probably the most humiliating thing that can happen when you die is that you come back as a fitted-sheet ghost.

84 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I haven’t lost my virginity because I never lose.

21 shares on X this month:

You can tell a lot about someone by the stuff you make up in your head about them.

67 shares on Pinterest this month:

Are you http? Because I’m :// without you.

11 shares on TikTok this month:

My recliner and I go way back.

48 shares on Snapchat this month:

Sorry, I’m late. I found my old CD collection.

38 shares on Reddit this month:

I be having full arguments in my head, then walk around mad like someone actually said something to me.

35 shares on LinkedIn this month:

If men didn’t exist, I would simply go for a 2 a.m. walk every night and listen to music in my AirPods.

30 shares on Slack this month:

As an outsider, what’s your view on intelligence?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

They should invent a rom-com where no one has to overhear anything that leads to a huge unnecessary misunderstanding.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

Are you the sun? Because you need to stay about 92,960,000 miles away from me.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

I hate apps that shut off your music when you open them, like how fu*king important do you think you are?

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

I hate when I turn off my brights for an incoming vehicle and then realize it’s a Cybertruck.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

America was more fun when organized crime was done by Italians in Chicago.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

Just walked by an empath and his head exploded.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

I can already feel that the day is going to seize me instead of the other way around.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

Are there cheat codes for parenting teenagers? This level is really hard.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

So apparently if they ask “do you trust me?”, replying with “well, I trust you to be you” is the incorrect response.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

Still don’t understand how girls with no jobs be holding iPhones.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Reddit:

I think I’ma end the year with a plot twist, everyone hold on tight.

Breaking via Messenger:

Men invented arm wrestling so they could hold hands and look into each other’s eyes.

Making waves on Discord:

Even my imaginary friend got bored and left me a note saying ‘we should see other people’

Spotted on LinkedIn:

When I write “I hope this email finds you well” I’m referring to the email’s skills in tracking you down.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

My wife is refusing to bring me a beer. That’s it, gonna text her and say “I cannot believe how lazy you are”.

Trending via Pinterest:

No place in this world is as dark as my archived chats on WhatsApp.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I love how bananas just take over the whole smoothie. You can never dim her light.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

If you want to complain about my driving at least calm down and get off my hood first.

Live now on Snapchat:

I make her eyes roll back. Not in bed though. I’m just annoying.

Making waves on Snapchat:

What doesn’t kill you makes you wish it did.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Taking yesterday’s bad mood on a multi-day tour.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Are you just gonna go with the flow until you spiral down the drain?

Adding “Free HBO” to your dating profile isn’t the game changer you’d think it’d be.

I just want what every middle-aged person wants: to remember what it was that I wanted.

At the self-checkout, I make small talk with myself and I wish I would just shut up.

In the autumn there are two types of creatures who collect acorns: squirrels and toddlers.

Pursuing an academic career is like thinking the stripper loves you.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨