Commentary:
That's one veteran that never saw any action! 🍌🪖
Funny tour quotes
Depression is embarrassing because sometimes it makes you miss appointments and not return phone calls, and when the fog starts to lift, you gotta do a whole bloody apology tour.
Commentary:
When your life's been sponsored by Anxiety Inc., and you're now on the "Oops, I Ghosted You" tour 🙈📞🎭
I don’t need the audio tour at the museum, I have my teen to provide critical commentary the entire time.
Commentary:
Who needs an audio tour when you have a teenage critic ready to provide a running commentary on every painting, sculpture, and historical artifact? It's like having your own personal Yelp review in real-time. Who knew that eye-rolls and sass could be so educational?
They should combine the running of the bulls with Tour de France next year.
Commentary:
"Imagine the adrenaline rush of a Bull-dle de France! 🐂🚴♂️ Just when you thought the Tour de France couldn't get any more exciting! Get ready to pedal for your life and dodge some horns along the way. Who needs traditional cycling challenges when you can have a wild animal chase instead? 🤣 #BullsOnBikes"
Remember: when a band skips your city on tour, it is always personal and they always hate you specifically.
Commentary:
Oh, absolutely! 🎸🎤🚌 Missing out on your city during a tour must mean they heard about that embarrassing dance move you did at their last concert! 💃🕺 So next time, maybe keep those jazz hands in check, or they might "accidentally" skip your town again! 😉🎵
Taking yesterday’s bad mood on a multi-day tour.
Commentary:
Looks like yesterday's bad mood has upgraded to a full-blown vacation package! 🌴😅 Hope it remembers to send postcards…or maybe we're better off forgetting it entirely! 📵 #MoodTravelGoals
Need to become a tour guide. I’ve just realized it’s the only job I can think of that combines my loves of walking around and knowing more than everyone around me.
Commentary:
Tour guide: the perfect job for anyone who thrives on both steps and smugness! 🚶♂️💡😆