Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Looks like you've got enough sigh power to light up the whole neighborhood! 💨💡 Better watch out for any sudden gusts of sarcasm coming your way! 😂"

amount, days, energy, exhaustion, farm, fuel, humor, sigh, small, wind

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The best thing capitalism has done is put a little window on pasta boxes so the noodles can look out at the world.

0

2 months ago

best, capitalism, done, food, humor, little, noodles, observation, pasta, perspective, put, thing, window, world
Got me some lemons now for the cold. I hope the tequila helps.

0

2 months ago

alcohol, cold, drink, help, hope, humor, i, lemon, lemons, me, remedy, tequila, winter
Grateful for independence mostly because British food is gross.

0

2 months ago

British, British food, culture, food, grateful, gratitude, gross, humor, independence, joke, taste
At this point, if a clown invited me into the woods, I would just go.

0

1 month ago

clown, fear, humor, i, invitation, invited, just, me, point, trust, woods
That moment when you cut into a seedless watermelon and find out it’s only allegedly seedless.

0

2 months ago

cut, expectation, fruit, humor, moment, seed, surprise, watermelon
I use karate strictly as a last resort, after I’ve exhausted fleeing and screaming.

0

3 months ago

after, art, exhausted, fleeing, humor, i, karate, last, last resort, martial, martial art, panic, resort, screaming, self-defense

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

83 shares on Telegram this month:

Plot twist: the universe is waiting for you to give it a sign.

20 shares on Instagram this month:

I fall in love with a song and play it until I absolutely don’t wanna hear it no more.

41 shares on Snapchat this month:

I feel like I’m in season 5 of my life, and the writers are just making ridiculous shit happen to keep it interesting.

59 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Sorry I can’t carpool to work. That’s the time I use to angry scream.

60 shares on Instagram this month:

If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments.

73 shares on Messenger this month:

The sandwich I made for lunch didn’t even make it until 10am.

18 shares on WeChat this month:

Getting out of a sports bra looks like it should be a professional women’s sport.

34 shares on X this month:

To accommodate the size of my wife’s new water bottle, we’ve replaced the passenger seat of her car with a cupholder.

93 shares on Pinterest this month:

We’ve all at least once caught our toes when putting on our knickers and jumped around the room like idiots.

22 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If I had 50¢ for every math test I’ve failed, I’d have $7.20.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

A big part of my job as a parent is moving things away from the edges of countertops.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has shared:

Bedrotting is so nice. Just lying in bed, using your phone comfortably.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Me summer vacation planning: I’m going to Europe. Bank account: You’re going camping.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

Grammar is important. It’s the difference between feeling your nuts and feeling you’re nuts.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

She is so narcissistic that her narcissism has narcissism.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

Nobody’s more stubborn than an Android person that won’t switch to iPhone.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

Do people still actually eat 3 meals a day, or do we all just survive off of stress and iced coffee?

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

Welcome to your 50s… A new pain will be be assigned to you shortly.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has shared:

Overthinking should at least burn calories.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

Just eating the emotional support snickers bar in my purse. How about you?

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Pinterest:

Incense sticks are just disappointing sparklers.

Breaking via Facebook:

I’ve skipped midlife crisis and gone straight to birdwatching.

Breaking via Telegram:

“You changed!” Yeah, I thought three days in the same outfit was kinda pushing it.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Next month is May. May all the money come to me.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Never understood when the movie rating says “May contain nudity.” Are there people on the ratings board who aren’t sure if they just saw someone naked?

Making waves on Messenger:

Saw a big spider crawl into my closet last night. He’s probably in there trying on all my clothes, acting like he’s me.

Just landed via Facebook:

Strangers vomiting their beliefs all over you every day is not good for the soul.

Breaking via Slack:

I think I just hit a Labubu with my car.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I think it’s extremely important, especially in the morning, to be quiet.

Going viral on TikTok:

Parents become grandparents and lose all their senses. All of a sudden, they got McDonald’s money now.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

The amount I’m sighing these days could fuel a small wind farm.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

The best thing capitalism has done is put a little window on pasta boxes so the noodles can look out at the world.

Got me some lemons now for the cold. I hope the tequila helps.

Grateful for independence mostly because British food is gross.

At this point, if a clown invited me into the woods, I would just go.

That moment when you cut into a seedless watermelon and find out it’s only allegedly seedless.

I use karate strictly as a last resort, after I’ve exhausted fleeing and screaming.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨