Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
📱🥪 "Watching some folks hold their cell phone to their ear is like witnessing a failed attempt at eating a digital sandwich! Maybe they're just hungry for a byte instead? 😄"

always, behavior, bite, call, cell, cell phone, communication, funny observation, hold, humor, i, observation, people, phone, quirky, quirky behavior, sandwich, take, think, trying

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Nobody shoots annoying people into the sun anymore and that’s why there are so many of them left on earth.

0

2 months ago

annoying, annoying people, Earth, funny observation, humor, left, nobody, observation, people, shoot, sun
Pilot is one of the few jobs where you can get fired for going above and beyond.

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2 months ago

above, aviation, beyond, fired, firing, going, going above and beyond, humor, job, jobs, pilot, profession, where, workplace
I remember when I was broke… I’m still broke, that’s why I remember so well.

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2 months ago

broke, financial, financial struggle, humor, i, joke, memory, money, remember, self-deprecating, self-deprecating humor, still, struggle, well, why
My toxic trait is thinking I deserve a break after sending one email.

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4 months ago

after, break, deserve, email, habit, humor, i, laziness, procrastination, productivity, self-awareness, thinking, toxic, toxic trait, trait, work, work habit
I don’t weigh myself because most scales don’t know how heavy all the grudges I’m holding onto are.

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2 months ago

balance, grudge, holding, humor, i, irony, know, myself, psychology, scale, self-image, weight
The first time I see a jogger smiling, I’ll consider it.

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2 months ago

consider, exercise, fitness, humor, i, irony, jogger, running, smiling, time

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

34 shares on Slack this month:

I just sneezed my wife awake from a nap so any discussion about renewing vows is on hold for a bit.

29 shares on Instagram this month:

Nothing prepared me for the part of adulthood where you look like a baby deer learning to walk every time you get out of bed in the morning.

80 shares on Snapchat this month:

I bought a calming tea but the smell and taste is making me nervous.

87 shares on Instagram this month:

The urge to buy people gifts they’ve mentioned they liked once.

25 shares on Slack this month:

Overheard the most hilarious conversation on my morning commute, then realized it was just me talking to myself in my car.

12 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Fundamentally, I understand chess, because I too would never let my king feel unsafe.

63 shares on Snapchat this month:

Back in the day, you used to have to listen to records backwards to discover conspiracy theories.

70 shares on TikTok this month:

“Your password is too weak!” Just wait until you see my impulse control.

69 shares on TikTok this month:

You’ll never realize how crazy you really are until you fall in love.

29 shares on Facebook this month:

People who scream sneeze need their own island.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

A really good magician could be living in your house and you would never know.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

If you were the birthday gift I bought my daughter 3 months ago, where would you be hiding?

Someone from 🇱🇮 has copied:

Telling the cop I’ll give him his nose back if he lowers his firearm.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has bookmarked:

Teaching myself ukulele! Neighbor keeping the beat on my wall!

Someone from 🇰🇪 has viewed:

“You’ve changed.” Yeah, I watched a new movie.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

If you call me from a private number, I’ll respect your privacy and won’t answer.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

I’m gonna start sending women unsolicited pizza pics.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

What a strange day. And it has been for years.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

In the baking aisle, booing everyone buying imitation vanilla extract.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

My toxic trait is thinking I deserve a break after sending one email.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Slack:

My guardian angel is taking the longest smoking break in recorded history.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

No one is more surprised than my kids every night when I say it’s bed time.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Sleeping in now means waking up without the alarm clock, but still at the same time.

Shared recently on X:

I never forget to eat, but I do eat to forget.

Trending via WeChat:

Don’t judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect.

Just shared via X:

I found a box of VHS tapes. I’m a bit nervous about the one that has the label torn off.

Seen just now on X:

Sunday is my favorite day where I pretend I’m going to do something productive.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

When people say something is cray-cray it makes me wanna vom-vom.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Met my soulmate again today: mashed potatoes and gravy.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Inflation is actually a good thing, it means money is going viral.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

The way some people hold their cell phone to make a call, I always think they’re trying to take a bite out of a sandwich.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Nobody shoots annoying people into the sun anymore and that’s why there are so many of them left on earth.

Pilot is one of the few jobs where you can get fired for going above and beyond.

I remember when I was broke… I’m still broke, that’s why I remember so well.

My toxic trait is thinking I deserve a break after sending one email.

I don’t weigh myself because most scales don’t know how heavy all the grudges I’m holding onto are.

The first time I see a jogger smiling, I’ll consider it.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨