Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Plot twist: Turns out the rest of the world didn't get the apocalypse memo and is just casually sipping lattes and scrolling through memes while Australia is battling desert bandits. 🌏☕️😂 #MadMaxRealityCheck"

Australia, concept, film, film concept, humor, mad, Mad Max, max, movie, normal, outside, pretty, satire, should, world

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

If you saw me licking the plate after the charcuterie was finished, no you didn’t.

0

2 months ago

after, charcuterie, denial, eating, finished, food, humor, licking, me, party, plate, saw, snack
Whales go days, sometimes weeks at a time without giving anyone their opinion.

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2 months ago

days, giving, humor, life, marine, marine life, observation, opinion, silence, time, weeks, whale
I want a president who promises no jobs. I don’t want to have a job.

0

2 months ago

humor, i, job, jobs, politics, president, promise, satire, want, work
Never signed up for a 401k cause there’s no way in hell I can run that far.

0

2 months ago

401k, cause, commitment, exercise, finance, hell, humor, i, joke, never, retirement, run, running, signed
My superpower is to make anyone I wanna make comfortable feel uncomfortable.

0

2 months ago

awkwardness, comfortable, feel, humor, i, irony, personality, skill, social, social skill, superpower, uncomfortable
Netflix & by yourself.

0

2 months ago

activity, alone, date, entertainment, fun, fun activity, Netflix, self-care, yourself

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

25 shares on Discord this month:

Happy return of “yes of course it’s bedtime, see how dark it is outside” to all parents who celebrate.

14 shares on Threads this month:

You can’t keep running away from your problems, you’re getting older and your kids are getting faster.

80 shares on X this month:

At what point in not being able to sleep do I throw the towel in and have a beer, since maybe that will help?

89 shares on Twitch this month:

Gosh, being a princess is exhausting.

32 shares on Reddit this month:

I hope the babies I was born with at the hospital are doing good.

37 shares on Facebook this month:

Find someone who cares about you as much as Gmail cares about new devices signing into your account.

31 shares on Twitch this month:

I love single sign-on because you only have to sign on once, 8 times a day.

24 shares on Telegram this month:

I wonder how many different vegetables they exploded before they discovered popcorn.

59 shares on WeChat this month:

Having to pee really puts things into perspective. Like, OK, none of this matters.

27 shares on Pinterest this month:

I had a sex dream last night that felt so real, I’m just gonna go ahead and add it to my body count.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

In a relationship with my heated car seat.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

This can’t be the same brain I was using to read 750-page novels in 3 days during middle school.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

Halloween is over and most people just keep on being creepy.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

That awkward moment when you spend an hour online picking out a gift for your friend’s son’s birthday and Amazon tells you it’s been a year since you bought this item.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

Girlhood is sitting down in a boiling hot shower instead of dealing with life.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

Girls actually do love nice guys. It’s just that you’re not as nice a guy as you think you are…

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

Giving all the dogs in my neighborhood matching sweaters for Christmas so they can be in a gang.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

I wish that reading books in the park were my job, and I got paid six figures for it.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

Got out of jury duty yesterday by confessing to the crime.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

People always ask me why there’s a chair in my shower. Who the hell eats breakfast standing up?

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

I think something is so beautifully wrong with you.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

“You look tired”. No, I’m just ugly.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Perks of being ugly: phone battery lasts longer.

Trending via Discord:

I hate when I forget to say something during an argument. Like, hey, let’s argue again, I got better material now.

Live now on Slack:

It’s strange that watching paint dry is considered boring but going to an art gallery is considered interesting. That’s just watching paint that’s already dry.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I’m done with self-care. Time to learn some spells.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

I think I’ll just let my jazz hands speak for themselves.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I think it’s clear that companies making medicine have no idea what fruits taste like.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Animals be 15 minutes old and already know what to do.

Trending via Telegram:

In my defense, they burned my grilled cheese sandwich.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

There should be a Mad Max movie that reveals the world outside Australia has actually remained pretty normal.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

If you saw me licking the plate after the charcuterie was finished, no you didn’t.

Whales go days, sometimes weeks at a time without giving anyone their opinion.

I want a president who promises no jobs. I don’t want to have a job.

Never signed up for a 401k cause there’s no way in hell I can run that far.

My superpower is to make anyone I wanna make comfortable feel uncomfortable.

Netflix & by yourself.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨