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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

Raise your hand if you’ve ever tried to breathe quieter while walking up a hill so strangers didn’t call 911.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has shared:

If GPT-5 will have ‘Ph.D.-level intelligence’, then GPT-6 will have the intelligence of someone who decided not to get a PhD.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

Most meetings end with the conclusion that everything needs to be discussed in another meeting.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

No, I wasn’t dancing. I got harassed by a bumble bee.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

I keep pressing the space bar, but I’m still on Earth.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has viewed:

Nobody’s more stubborn than an Android person that won’t switch to iPhone.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

I wonder if babies know that we are more terrified of them than they are of us.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

Why be just a part of the solution when you can be the whole problem?

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

Hi, I’m a social media user, you might know me from such hits as “I’m leaving this stupid place” and “I’m back everybody.”

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

Welcome to your 50s… A new pain will be be assigned to you shortly.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

822 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,984

Funny Quotes Topics

13,927

Funny Quotes Images

10,984

58 minutes ago

3,429

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Instagram:

Why is everyone against sugar? Who stood beside you when things went wrong and you were sad? It wasn’t lettuce, for sure.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

My favorite dinner is the one made by someone else.

Just landed via YouTube:

It’s amazing how music can transport you to another place. For example, this coffee shop is playing Justin Bieber, so I’m going to another restaurant.

Breaking via YouTube:

Welcome to your 40’s. You now have a favorite vegetable peeler.

Going viral on YouTube:

Did you guys know that you can actually do whatever you want all the time?

Going viral on Telegram:

Liberté. Egalité. Second Coffeé.

Live now on WhatsApp:

November should have one more day. Just because to me November 31st sounds real. And also I don’t want to pay rent tomorrow.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

The problem with self-checkout is that all the cashiers are idiots.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Coworker: Hey, circling back on that thing we talked about in December. Me: Stop living in the past!

Shared recently on Reddit:

I heard God is testing both of us at the same time. Wanna hang out?

This Christmas, get her the gift that’ll last a lifetime. Give her a tortoise.

6 months ago

This Christmas, get her the gift that’ll last a lifetime. Give her a tortoise.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
🎁🐢 This Christmas, why settle for fleeting joy when you can gift everlasting companionship with a tortoise? 🎄🐢 Sure, it may not fit under the tree, but hey, the gift of a tortoise is a gift that truly keeps on giving… and giving… and giving. 🎁🐢 Who needs diamonds when you can have a shelled friend for life? 😉 #TortoiseLove

Christmas, funny gift, gift, give, holiday, humor, joke, last, lifetime, pet, tortoise, unique, unique gift

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

822 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,984

Funny Quotes Topics

13,927

Funny Quotes Images

10,984

58 minutes ago

3,419

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇹 has copied:

Apparently, when you treat someone the same way they treat you, they get offended!

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

Waking up has backfired on me so many times.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

Ever since I turned 20, someone is always in Japan or Italy. Is it like this forever?

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

I want to be cuddled, but I also want to be left alone. Being crazy is hard.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

If I had a boyfriend, I’d put him in a snow globe and shake it really hard.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

It takes a lot of balls to golf the way I do.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has viewed:

Uh oh, said somethin’ weird. Better fix it by saying something even weirder.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

Heartbreaking: Introvert sentenced to 100 hours of hanging out.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

Oh great, you brought your ancient ancestors with you.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

If you’re partying with your cousin and you’re asked if you’re related, “Our parents are siblings” will cause a lot of confusion.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Instagram:

I never get as envious of parents as I do when their baby starts crying and they get to leave the event.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

The mattress in the guest room was perfectly fine until I had to sleep on it once.

Making waves on TikTok:

I know that we aren’t supposed to self diagnose but I’ve googled all of my symptoms and I’m fairly sure I’m a raccoon.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Just had a crazy revelation: you can eat in the airport after your flight, too.

Spotted on X:

I need someone to look at me the way I look at memes.

Going viral on WeChat:

Declined stepping on the scale at the doctor’s office because no one needs that kind of negativity in her life.

Just shared via Slack:

Automatic doors that don’t open fast enough make me look dumb.

Seen just now on YouTube:

So rude to come up with solutions to my excuses.

Seen just now on WeChat:

He’s a 10 but so is his volume.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

You sound unhinged. Let’s go get mugshots.

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