Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Not me out here checking the growth progress of my potted flowers only a couple hours after I planted the seeds in the first place.
  • When the Olympics finally introduces the event “Dropping your phone and very nearly catching it but not quite” then you’ll all see me shine.
  • Debugging is like being the detective in a crime where you are also the murderer. Following the clues of an idiot.
  • I wonder if it’s possible to swim from one end to the other in a pool filled with mashed potatoes.
  • I just tried to poach an egg and I now understand why Eggs Benedict is $23
  • Me: God, please stop giving me your toughest battles. God: You just have to empty the dishwasher.